Musings – We can be heroes just for one day…

Ever just randomly pick out an album to play? Well, I do…  I went to the vinyl this time and picked Heroes by David Bowie. Perfect choice for where I am at lately.

Mercury retrograde is a sore topic for me. I am born with Mercury retro as part of my Scorpio stellium and Mercury is quite active in my chart. Some astrologers say that Mercury retro transits are easier for those born with this placement, Hogwash I say, hogwash! Like most challenges, I have learned to adjust and make the most of what lies before me. I strive to use the energies to promote growth whenever I can.

Mercury is in Cancer and Jupiter just moved into Cancer. On July 8th, Saturn goes direct at 4 degrees Scorpio, in my 8th house. On July 17th, while Mercury is still retro, a lovely water trine emerges between Jupiter, Saturn, and Neptune. This is a great time to reflect on all things water: dreams, emotions, the past, family, one’s shadow, soul yearnings, etc..

I am taking advantage of this time by recovering lost parts of myself. I had a lucid dream recently that I have taken to both my dream groups. I don’t want to blog about the details now, but I will say that I consciously asked those gathered in my dream to tell me whatever they wanted me to know. The last comment a female figure made was for me to look into a time ” before baby-sitting.” Both groups suggested that I try dream re-entry to gather more information. So far no luck, but perhaps I am not ready to go that route. I also am working on uncovering the mystery of my Indian restaurant adventure.  For all I know, they may be linked. They both lead me back to what is the past in 3D linear time.

So I spent part of this weekend compulsively watching the entire first season of Felicity on cable because it was available via a special promotion. I cried and smiled and sobbed and laughed and reminisced. Here are the roots of the word Felicity from http://www.wordnik.com :

Felicity – Definitions

American Heritage® Dictionary of the English Language, Fourth Edition

  1. n. Great happiness; bliss.
  2. n. An instance of great happiness.
  3. n. A cause or source of happiness.
  4. n. An appropriate and pleasing manner or style: felicity of expression.
  5. n. An instance of appropriate and pleasing manner or style.
  6. n. Archaic Good fortune.

Century Dictionary and Cyclopedia

  1. n. Happiness; bliss; blessedness; a blissful or happy state.
  2. n. That which produces or promotes happiness; a felicitous circumstance or state of things; a source of happiness: most commonly in the plural.
  3. n. A skilful or happy faculty or turn; felicitous adroitness or propriety; a happy knack or choice; appropriateness: as, a rare felicity of phrase.
  4. n. An appropriate or happy turn of thought or expression.
  5. n. In astrology, a favorable aspect.
  6. n. Synonyms Blessedness, Bliss, etc. (see happiness); joy, comfort, blissfulness, success, good fortune.
  7. n. Aptness.

Wiktionary

  1. n. Happiness.
  2. n. Apt and pleasing style in writingspeech, etc.
  3. n. Something that is either a source of happiness or particularly apt.
  4. n. Reproduction of a sign with fidelity. eg. “The quotation was rendered with felicity.”

GNU Webster’s 1913

  1. n. The state of being happy; blessedness; blissfulness; enjoyment of good.
  2. n. That which promotes happiness; a successful or gratifying event; prosperity;blessing.
  3. n. A pleasing faculty or accomplishment.

WordNet 3.0

  1. n. state of well-being characterized by emotions ranging from contentment to intense joy
  2. n. pleasing and appropriate manner or style (especially manner or style of expression)

Etymologies

  1. From Latin felicitās (“luck”), from Latin felix (“lucky”). (Wiktionary)
  2. Middle English felicite, from Old French felicite, from Latin fēlīcitās, from fēlīx, fēlīc-, fortunate; see dhē(i)- in Indo-European roots. (American Heritage® Dictionary of the English Language, Fourth Edition)

The show’s lead character Felicity has difficulty with choices once she enters young adulthood. Art or medicine, California or New York, the wounded bad boy or the wounded good guy, forgiveness or self-judgement. I had forgotten how much this series resonated for me. I feel that some of the mystery derived from my dream and the Indian restaurant is contained within long forgotten conflicts and choices.

Midlife is a time for women to explore their second coming of age. I am not sure of how this plays out because I am living within this life passage.  Maybe this is in preparation of one’s second Saturn return. I am so glad I am not there yet! But Saturn is making its way towards my Neptune, Sun, and then beloved retrograde Mercury.

It’s funny that I picked David Bowie because I dated 3 Davids. One referred to himself as Dave and the other I called Dave.  The last one was David. The two Daves are from my college days. The name Dave just bothers me now and I know it’s because I don’t want to feel all the residual, unhealed pain. The pain about one man whose huge heart simultaneously made him my true angel and his own worst nightmare.  The pain about the other man, whose inability to be grounded in his being, despite his best efforts, created much confusion and ultimately influenced many of my beliefs about men and romantic love.

© User:Colin / Wikimedia Commons / CC-BY-SA-3.0

This is the thing about healing: it is cyclical in nature. Just like an onion, there are layers upon layers to unravel until you are complete. My dream and parallel adventure are showing me that more layers need to be excavated. I believe that an awesome opportunity awaits me, to examine once more people and places from my past that are begging for attention and care. These next few weeks may prove to be fruitful because the transits are so favorable.  This excavation requires patience, tenacity and courage. But can’t we all show up as heroes in our lives, when we are called? Maybe we can, if even just for one day…

Please share your insights about Mercury retrograde,  the Saturn station in Scorpio, Jupiter’s return to Cancer, and the upcoming Grand Water Trine. May you find felicity in these transits as you explore the watery side of your nature.

How are you experiencing the water energies?

Where does Mercury affect your chart?

What mystery are you pursuing in your life?

Felicity (TV Series 1998–2002) – IMDb

image by © User:Colin / Wikimedia Commons / CC-BY-SA-3.0

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