Piece of Cake

litebeing,

wikipedia.org public domain

Dealing with my anger has been challenging. Now that I have a minor? concussion, I have noticed my agitation increase. It is one of many possible manifestations of a brain injury, but hey, I’ve felt agitated for many years. I am wired with a short fuse and an impatient nature.

Anger has plagued me off and on through out my life. As a young adult, my temper was out of control at times. My behavior has certainly calmed down as I have matured, but often impatience or anxiety morph into verbal outbursts that I quickly regret.

I have been consciously working on monitoring my agitation and managing my responses  accordingly. Lately as work as become more stressful, I notice resentment becoming more dominant in daily living. Honestly, life has really been throwing me so much more than I am capable of handling. So I am slowing down even more and redirecting my thoughts as often as needed.

Yesterday I visited Cake for the first time, for what I hoped would be a quick lunch. It is a lovely little restaurant/bakery attached to a popular gift boutique. It is known to be loud and crowded, but I figured it would be quiet this weekend. I was wrong.

I was made to wait an inordinate amount of time for a table. I thought it was because I was dining alone and this is a long-held resentment of mine. I have thought that single people are treated poorly by the public in general. It turns out that in this instance it was not the case. But yet I was snarky, sarcastic, and nasty to some of the staff and I noticed it was creating much negativity. I wanted to change this energy if I could. What if it is time for this long-held belief to be discarded?

Once I was seated, I began to relax. I noticed a couple of women dining to my left and one of them was wearing exquisite, unusual jewelry. I did something I rarely do, I initiated a conversation with them.  It felt awkward initially, but one of the women eventually engaged with me. I complimented her on the fabulous bracelet and ring she was wearing. Turns out the pink ring was a pink sapphire. It was otherworldly in its beauty. We discussed local restaurants and I was given the names of some vegetarian places to try. Considering my dietary changes, I am on the lookout for healthier places to add to my list. I am glad that I made the overture as it was beneficial for all concerned.

The food at Cake was delicious. While the waitress was not so great, I decided to be gracious. She reminded me of Jennifer Aniston and I told her so. She lit up at this remark and her energy shifted. As she became softer, so did I. Love when that happens!

I flashed back to a recent day out with my mom. She is an extrovert and delights in talking with random people wherever she goes. I can now see how extending myself and shifting my focus can have excellent results. It was not an easy transformation, but definitely worthwhile. Who said spiritual growth was a piece of cake?

 

cake photo ~ wikipedia.org, public domain

Published by litebeing

Seeking magic and awe in ordinary moments

23 Comments

  2. Pingback: 111111 and more – litebeing chronicles

  3. As Dayna points out you had to hit yourself on the head and she and I just had to listen to the change of vibration that was coming from us… BUT it is all old nonsense that we are finally releasing. The test is to observe it, not to claim it as ours… and continue to enjoy life no matter what… imagining our desires coming into play… until they do. Love to you dear Linda x

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    1. I had to reread your comment to grasp your meaning, and now I think that I understand. I appreciate your consistent reminders Barbara. I am less of a quick study when I am under a lot of stress. Having attended the Hay House Conference today, many of the speakers reinforced your message and it is an important message indeed.

      I am noticing more often how my mind continues to stick to old tapes and can be so subtle and clever in its machinations.

      Thank you for honoring the Divine in you and the Divine in the “separate” parts of you, like myself and the rest of the collective.

      love, Linda

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      1. I resonated so much with your getting yourself into an even more vulnerable state… that I giggled to myself and saw how I unconsciously put myself in ‘uncomfortable’ positions in order to love myself just a little bit more deeply. My own anger just lately has been tempting me to implement old ways of victimhood instead of just loving ALL of myself… IAM getting there and I know you are too. Life for me is about being compassionate with myself… so that my love flows out to the ones around me. I do hope you felt my love and gratefulness of our friendship. Take care dear Linda and keep loving yourself, no matter what. xxx Barbara

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  4. I applaud you for the strides you’re making…and for sharing…but as others have said…take care of yourself, the blog can wait. 🙂

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      1. I believe I understand a little bit…I’ve been experiencing a yawning chasm in my doodler/photographer life. I have ideas floating around in my brain but no desire to get something down on paper or captured in a camera. I don’t feel depressed and since I’ve been depressed off and on throughout my life I know what it feels like. I’m not sure what this is…perhaps something new turning up on my life’s journey. I’ve wondered if it’s related, at all, to the anniversary of Don’s death (22 October). All I know is I need to create something or I will slowly disappear, like the cat in “Alice in Wonderland.” Wishing creative joy for both of us 🙂

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      2. It could be related to the anniversary, or not. Sometimes the creative dry spells or lack of initiative can be mysterious. I want to write but I do not want to devote the time and energy right now to organize my thoughts into a seamless piece. I am glad to be responding to comments and noticing the natural flow emerge. Writing can be rhythmic for me, and then it is less work and more play. 🙂

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      3. I’m trying to stay open to the urge to create…I don’t feel like I’ve totally fallen down the creative drought hole…I believe I might be throwing up my own mental obstacles…hmmmmm!

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  5. First Linda I want to say as I forgot when I left a comment on your last post, congrats for your 3 months probation period at work.. Wonderful and where did that time fly too?

    Second sorry to hear about your concussion and hope since writing this you have noticed an improvement in your energies..
    And yes sometimes when we make the effort to engage in conversations we are surprised at the responses..
    And no doubt your own shift of energy helped shift the day of the young waitress with that compliment..
    I often people watch and wonder what has made them feel down and grumpy.. looking beyond what they portray often allows us to be more tolerant and patient with their behaviours..
    And as you yourself are getting more sensitive, you instantly felt that shift in vibration..
    Wonderful visit to CAKE all round..
    Enjoy your weekend my friend.. Hugs and Much LOVE..
    Sue ❤

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    1. Hi Sue,
      Thanks for your heartfelt reply. The time goes fast and slow for me, often concurrently. if that makes sense. I worked hard to get to this point, and when ready I may write more about my new job. I am thankfully healing from the concussion and still astonished that it happened. Regarding Cake, it is clear to me that we always have a choice about how we behave, and often it takes tremendous effort to make a conscious choice. Enjoy the rest of your weekend too! ❤ Linda

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      1. Good to know you are healing from the concussion.. And you will write when you are ready to Linda.. Know in the mean time.. As you create space in your life to relax more between your demanding job, that you have to put yourself first.. Love and Hugs xxx

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  6. Sorry to hear about your concussion. I hope you get better soon.

    I love the story about initiating the conversation. Yes, there are so many blessings once we step out of our comfort zone. That lesson is coming up for me, too.
    Hugs
    Karin

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