Poetry ~ Gratitude

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GRATITUDE

G – Generosity of spirit manifesting in each moment, with each inhalation

R- Resilience in the face of darkness, supporting me through many a storm

A- Ability to share myself through writing, teaching, healing, BEING

T- Twinkle of light in a child’s eyes, the sunset, my heart

I – Inspiration that never ceases to amaze me and warm my soul

T- Treasures that unfold effortlessly and in a multitude of forms

U- Unconditional love , from Dexter, family of choice, my friends near and far

D-Dreams manifesting mysteriously and magnificently, especially here at WordPress

E- Eternal miracles, just waiting to be discovered, right under my nose

Thanksgiving has always been my favorite holy-day. Maybe that’s because it arrives so close to my Midheaven, or perhaps it’s my mother’s incredible stuffing. Then again it could be the ability to include anyone you want at the table, without the pressure of gifts or material constraints.  Less hype, more substance.

I personally am not a fan of holidays in general. The Quakers were right in saying that every day is holy. It can be if we choose to live and love in each moment. What makes Thanksgiving sacred to me is the idea of a tribal feasting and gratitude practice. Frankly there have been some years where I had difficulty reciting my blessings round the dinner table. Life has not always been kind or simple. Tomorrow it will difficult for my family to shut me up when it is my turn to share my blessings. With tears in my eyes and a glow in my heart, I am so aware what a remarkable year this has been! No, it has not been without challenges, mishaps, losses, and delays. But this is the first time in decades where I have realized so many of my original dreams and desires. Sometimes I just have to pinch myself. I never knew life could be so incredible…

But then again, it’s probably the stuffing, yummy!

Wishing you and yours a Blessed Thanksgiving, even if you do not formally celebrate! Let the love and bounty into your heart and tell everyone that you love them…

poem by litebeing chronicles © 2013

image by wikimedia.org 

INFJ at the Holidays?

UPDATE: Hello my wonderful readers! My plan is to reblog a couple holiday favorites and a new post sometime within the next few days ( or sooner). I wish a joyous Thanksgiving to all who celebrate and a happy Neptune Direct/sag New Moon / Mercury Direct to everyone!

Much love, Linda ❤

 

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Happy 12-12 everyone! Could not let today pass without some new material, so…

I was ready to dive into an astrology article including Taylor Swift, but she will have to shake it off just a little bit longer. I am sensing a need to write about how to navigate the holiday season with fun and a lot less drama. I have wanted to write about INFJs and HSPs ( Highly Sensitive People) for a while, and this seems to be the perfect time.

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 Where is the INFJ in this picture?

He or she is probably in the basement or store bathroom with their hands over their ears! The INFJ personality is very sensitive, intuitive, headstrong, and idealistic. This  archetype is also generally quite introverted, perfectionistic, and value-driven. I think the HSP personality is a derivative of the INF ( Introvert Intuitive Feeling) categories in the Myers Briggs system.

As a card-carrying member of both clubs, I can unequivocally say that this time of year can be difficult. While I am still carrying out my radical gratitude practice, I am also aware that taking practical steps towards improved self-care should not be brushed aside. Be grateful that you are swamped with party invitations, but don’t feel obligated to attend all of them.

Here are some helpful tips for INFJs and HSPs and the people who love them. Take them with copious grains of salt and discernment. You will know what works best for you.

1 – Goody – goody, my inner self replies. INFJs love lists, plans and calendars! We are not the most flexible people on the planet and can get stressed out with spontaneous or last-minute changes in plans. It is OK to decline an invitation or suggest a quiet get together after the holidays. Know your limits and respect them.

2 – If you are at a dinner or party with an INFJ or HSP and engage them in small talk or gossip, don’t be surprised if they tune you out or head for the nearest exit. We like to communicate, but we don’t do meaningless chat. Ask us about what we are reading or our favorite causes. Tell us about your hopes and dreams or your ideal travel destination. Don’t bore us with tales about The Housewives of Las Vegas or details on your brother’s latest get rich scheme.

3 – We get overstimulated quickly and crowds make us uneasy. I have learned to pick and choose my social activities wisely. If I find myself in a setting that is too loud or negative or just plain chaotic, I will seek out someone whose company I enjoy and strike up a conversation. If that isn’t possible, I will excuse myself and leave. I am not shy and can easily initiate conversations. INFJs and HSPs are not necessarily shy wallflowers. Where you fit on the continuum will determine how introverted and sensitive you are, and that is often subject to change. Introversion does not imply shyness anyway. It means that we are drained by people. We are energized by going within.  I love interacting with people in real-time, but I need to have some control over my environment and know my limitations.

4 – If you notice you are overindulging in food or alcohol, it may be a sign that you are stuffing your emotions. I have coped with over-stimulation in the past by drinking way too much and I don’t really like to drink! Listen to the messages that your feelings deliver to you instead, and don’t behave in ways that don’t serve you. There is a difference between enjoying holiday treats and self-medicating. If you do not know the difference, get some support so that you can learn what works for you. Ask yourself if it is really worth it to alter your brain chemistry just to be in a room with people.

5 – Sensitive types often react to stress in a variety of ways. We are prone to migraines, digestive issues, and allergies. Some fragrances and noises trigger these reactions. Do not take it personally if we cannot be around your perfume or cigarette smoke or accompany you to a rave at the local warehouse. It isn’t you , it is us. Sensitivity is such a tremendous gift, but it comes with a price.

6 – In this hyper-consumerism culture, the pressure is high to buy, buy, buy. INFJs love to please our loved ones with unique, person-specific gifts. We delight in these details and remember that you adored that one-of- a- kind brooch while window shopping last July. Again, it is important to be kind to yourself. It really is okay if you cannot afford to buy everything for everyone all of the time. We can be so hard on ourselves and that self-criticism can be projected onto others when it gets out of hand. Let yourself off your self-imposed hook. If money is tight or time is limited, use your creativity instead. Bake, sew, knit, draw, or  photograph personal tokens of holiday cheer. It really is the thought that counts at the end of the day. This is why I really prefer Thanksgiving!

7 – Last but not least, feed your soul. HSPs and INFJs really benefit from the following activities: walk in nature, meditate, pray, create art, visit places of beauty, do yoga, take frequent breaks from your routine to just BE, write, play an instrument, read…  The more you love yourself, the better prepared you are to be in the world, but not of the world.

Please let me know if I forgot anything. Fellow INFJs and HSPs, I know you are out there!

 

Resources:

http://www.myersbriggs.org/my-mbti-personality-type/mbti-basics/

http://www.hsperson.com

http://www.hsperson.com/test/highly-sensitive-test/

http://mbtitoday.org/carl-jung-psychological-type/  

 

Related post: https://litebeing.com/2013/07/02/an-interesting-detailed-description-of-the-infj/

image by wikiart.org, public domain

Reclaiming My Day 11/11/19

This autumn was less vibrant, or maybe I missed the foliage at its peak. You see, I was ill for over a month with a “mystery illness”. It came and went and later returned, near my birthday. My birthday was last Wednesday and I took the day off from work excited to see where the day would take me. But when I woke up in pain and so nauseated that I had to vomit, I know I wasn’t going anywhere. The feeling of nausea and the act of vomiting are among the most dreadful experiences to me. The fact that this happened on my birthday pissed me off! Vomiting rarely happens to me as an adult and the fact it happened on my day of rebirth was cruel. But, as usual, I adjusted to my circumstances and focused on feeling better. It appears ( not definitively ) that the new probiotics I am taking are making me sick.  After weeks of tests and no answers, I started to improve without treatment. The only change made was the elimination of my supplements, recommended by my GI specialist. At first, I was skeptical but went along anyway. After my test results returned to “normal”, the doctors were no longer interested in figuring out a diagnosis. So a few days later I went back on the probiotics and the symptoms returned. So I stopped taking them again and am also noticing a lessening of symptoms. How could this product that I considered life-saving be the culprit? Could it be a bad batch or some other reason? I don’t know.

I began leasing a car about 3 years ago, just a couple weeks before my birthday. So it was time to trade in Kokoa for a newer model. Say hello to Azia! I named her after the lovely blue color that reminds me of the astral. From astral I came up with Azia.  I chose this particular model because it is a very quiet ride. I revel in quiet these days, not to mention, standard features include a sunroof and heated seats! While not much brings me joy anymore, I hoped a new car would help because I really dig cars. I also like the free trial of Sirius Radio but really miss not having a CD player. So much has become obsolete in these “modern times. ”

Please enjoy this song that also helped inspire Azia’s name:

The past few days have been exhausting and liberating, all leading up to a new start for me. I took two risks, one planned and one rather spontaneous. At a book club with my Social Work group, I disclosed something very private. I barely gave it a minute of contemplation. Someone in the group shared a personal story and I was moved. I decided to be authentic and see what happens. It was a chance to be more vulnerable, but there was more to it. Later I realized that I was challenging some of the older LCSWs on how non-judgmental and inclusive they really are. Behind the political correctness and blind obedience to ethics, I wondered ” Will they walk their talk? ” It turns out that I still know how to shut up a room! It is disheartening to see that I still feel superior or above the established groups I belong to, but not ( hopefully) in a narcissistic way. People are people and most I encounter have little consciousness. Part of me already knew I might be rejected, but I was feeling rejected in other sectors of my life anyway.

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The second risk I took happened yesterday. I fired my clinical supervisor, this judgmental, rigid, mean woman who I have paid to provide me with supervision to prepare me for a higher level of licensure. I have worked with her off and one since 2017, the second of three people I have hired to walk me through this minefield. She has misled me about many things and I let them go. She does not respect my wishes, she is petty, and sometimes passive-aggressive. She will not be accountable for any mistakes she makes and has threatened to end our association a few times. She is unpredictable and often remembers events very differently from my recollections. I kept this going because of fear I would not find someone else affordable, nearby, and able to meet me outside of my work schedule. But after a few sleepless nights, I decided enough was enough. I did not have the courage to confront her directly but I left a detailed voicemail on her phone. I was also afraid she would sabotage my LCSW application if I stayed with her. I wonder why I keep attracting these cold women into my life after so much therapy and other forms of inner work. Maybe so that I can continue to take better care of me? I have not found a new replacement, but I am glad I let her go. So many people abuse their power and do not question how they handle their responsibilities. I hope I will choose better next time.

So what about my blog title? When will I write about 11-11? Patience is a virtue, right? I decided I would take back my birthday this weekend if I felt up to it. I enjoy time alone to travel somewhere and indulge in activities that bring me pleasure and/or peace. Today I felt well enough to drive to South Street and visit a new find and an old haunt. Dishes that feature fall flavors are among my favorites and I planned on going somewhere for Oktoberfest. That did not happen so today I discovered the very popular Brauhaus Schmitz.

Doesn’t that look good? It is schnitzel with mushroom sauce, cabbage, and spaetzle. I could not finish it all, but it was delicious. The cabbage was amazing, so yummy with the mushroom sauce. Authenticity matters to me, in cuisine and in people!

A few blocks away is The Garland of Letters, a bookstore that opened in 1972, way before my college days when South St was one of my typical hangouts. It is reassuring that it still remains in its original location, featuring all the spiritual books and gifts anyone could wish for.

This is my little present to me from me, a cool book about chakras that I just had to have. I wanted something I could take back home with me to carry on the 11-11 energy. Going downtown did shift my awareness and increase my vibration. I felt it rather quickly. Synchs were happening with regularity and my mood brightened. I was also delighted to notice that fall foliage was rather abundant in Center City. I took a few shots from my car ( while the vehicle was stopped).

I am aware that today’s blog could have been spread over several posts, but I see it as a complete story. Existence can be dark and hopeless and full of pain, regrets, and lost opportunities until the opposite emerges. Birthdays or solar returns, whichever you prefer, is a time of reflection for me. This was not a stellar year in many respects, months of illness, much upheaval, disappointment, and displacement. Yet, chakra bibles, trees bursting with color, and liberation can manifest, sometimes when hope is lost and letting go is the only choice that works. So I chose a new birthday this year and hope the memories I made will reverberate throughout the next solar cycle.

HAPPY 11 – 11 TO YOU!

We were looking for your Blog

Happy Samhain season litebeings! It is not really on Halloween, more mid-Scorpio, so you have missed nothing yet. I plan to post today as more of a journal-style entry, experimenting with a new technique. Re-working one’s writing style is très Mercury Retrograde you know?

So here goes nothing:

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I have come to the conclusion, as of today, that all points of view are true, that no one is ever wrong, regardless of intelligence, morality, logic, or dishonest leanings. It is pointless to argue with anyone if the goal is to change someone’s opinion. Motivational Interviewing is a therapy technique used to connect with people who have sought ( or were mandated to seek) therapy. The idea is to allow the client to be where they are, be supportive, assess where they are in terms of readiness for change, and point out any discrepancies between their goal and their choices. This strategy acknowledges it is futile to try to force someone’s hand.

This idea triggered my mind to retrieve a quote I like ” If someone wants to leave your life, let them. ” It goes something like that. Basically, it implies that we are better off without those people at this time. They no longer belong in your life.  Reminds me of the three levels of teaching in Manual for Teachers in A Course in Miracles. Time spent together is unimportant, since time is a construct. What is important is what one gains from the teaching/learning potential during the course of the encounter.

What’s my point? We all exist in a separate plane of being, our own dimension/frequency that is rarely static. We are all one, but not in physical form. So each individual expression of energy has its own universe ( one – song). I do believe that there can be an overlap between 2 people or more, but not for extended intervals. These overlaps are fleeting more often than not. So if someone doesn’t “get me” and my efforts to connect are rejected and/or thwarted, it is best to just surrender. I cannot seem to attract many kind, decent authority figures into my orbit, at least not for a good stretch of time. I keep attracting cold, passive-aggressive, manipulative types who control something I need, like a paycheck or my LSCW. I feel beyond exhausted. I know my childhood was fraught with toxicity, but I also thought I had done more than my share of inner work and clearing the crap out of ” my field. ”

It feels like most people have no idea who I am or what I want or hope to accomplish. Today I had an image of my life being over while still breathing – meaning that it is possible to have exhausted one’s life force. I equate this with a product that has expired. You can still use it, but its quality has diminished because it is no longer in its prime or at its peak expression of vitality. Could my life force be compared to moldy cheese?

Perhaps this is why I was initially excited when a coworker greeted me yesterday with these words ” We were looking for your blog today. ”

What?

I told a friendly coworker that I am an astrologer after we discovered our birthdays are 4 days apart ( different year). She shares an office with a colleague who I find challenging. Anyway, I asked them both how their week went and if it was as bizarre as mine has been.  Then  I mentioned the frustrations of Mercury Retrograde. They had no idea what I meant.  Said challenging person’s face lit up though when I mentioned astrology and was excited when I said I am an astrologer. She asked if I have a business and I said that I advertise on my blog.  She wondered if I could do some astro type activities for her program if her boss agrees.

I wasn’t sure about this. After all, people in 2019 still are judgy about all the woo. So even while hearing the word blog uttered in the office was lovely, I told her that my blog is anonymous and I am not sure I feel ready to share myself that deeply at work. No one really pushed the issue, but for a moment I thought that maybe I am still alive, not sure though. Figured I better blog again and see what happens next.

PS: Move your clocks back one hour tonight if you live in the US.