Pete and Me

Gemini

Update: Warning, this is a spoiler alert about Westworld. In Season 2 Westworld enters the life extension business. How’s that for another synchronicity?

Happy New Gemini Moon everyone! Before the moon moves into Cancer, I want to get this post out about consciousness, a very mercurial subject. I stumbled upon an article about Pete Buttigieg and decided to take a look. The article contains an interview with Mayor Pete about how he is spending his time nowadays. I was astonished to discover we have the same viewing habits! When asked about what he is watching , this is his reply: ” We got pretty deep into “Westworld.” I know I’m like five years late on that. We’re starting to get into this show “Upload.” I am also just starting Westworld and just completed Upload and am completely obsessed with both of these shows. While Pete and I have little in common outwardly, I am wondering why he is drawn to these shows. This synch came on the heels of my watching the Season 1 finale of Westworld which I cannot stop thinking about. Yes, it is THAT GOOD.

I will try not to spoil anything here, but I have to share the basic premise of Season 1, and maybe the entire series. Westworld is about an adult theme park featuring AI set in  19th Century Western United States. It is a place where guests can come and explore all their fantasies without any consequences. Over time it becomes clear that the AI “hosts” are retaining some of their memories of being exploited and abused by the guests. When they are ” killed” they are brought back online and awaken from an allegedly dreamless sleep. However,  many of the characters begin to evolve based on retaining memories and developing intuition and wisdom. They become sentient beings, likely to evolve past the humans who created them. Once they awaken, they cannot revert back to who they were before and life has permanently changed. This is similar in some ways to Upload, which is where a young man who dies in a car accident and whose girlfriend signs him up for life extension. Life extension is a process whereby a technician uploads one’s consciousness onto an avatar so humans can still be “alive “. In Upload we see what happens to the main character and his “angel” while he roams around a for-profit luxury virtual afterlife. Upload is a dramedy yet also about moral evolution and awakening within a virtual reality.

So much of my favorite entertainment, both old and new, revolves around this theme – Groundhog Day, The Good Place, Vanilla Sky, and Black Mirror’s San Junipero episode, just to name a few. In all these shows and movies, the main character(s) are altered somehow while asleep or unconscious. Eventually they discover the key to enlightenment. The repetition of this theme is not random, at least I do not see it that way. Westworld in particular emphasizes how humans and AI operate within loops and rely on their “stories” to define identity. It is suggested that awakening requires that we abandon the narratives and make the best choices we can, knowing that there is still some programming interfering with absolute free will. This had me considering the notion of the inmates running the asylum, as the actual “asylum personnel” are interested only in conformity, control, and monetization of the enslaved. Naturally I landed on the familiar Matrix notion that we live in a simulation and need to free ourselves.

All life is sentient or at least has the potential to become sentient. Isn’t it interesting how much entertainment “programming ” focuses on rebooting aka reincarnation? I welcome your thoughts on this in the comments below. While Westworld has too much violence ( like The Sopranos, Game of Thrones, and other HBO darlings) and Upload can be a bit campy, they are excellent opportunities to see evolution in action. As someone who often remembers dreams and can occasionally go lucid, I hope I can forge ahead with my own ascension, pandemic or not.

Related posts :

https://litebeing.com/2020/03/09/staycation-is-in-session/

https://litebeing.com/2019/12/02/undone/

https://litebeing.com/2018/06/23/to-be-or-not-to-be-simulated-existence/

https://litebeing.com/2020/02/09/litebeings-guide-to-the-movies-5/

PS – take a closer look at the trees in these photos and you will see more than meets the eye.

Anticipatory Grief

While one may say this is the perfect time to solidify a meditation practice, I am not finding this true for me. I will use the Calm app or be still for 3o seconds when the Calm commercial comes on but I am not drawn to regular sit down meditation right now. I will find myself staring out the window, mesmerized by nature’s stirrings. While walking outside today I was gently focusing on the buds floating on the breeze’s carpet, making soft patterns in the air. Simply observing the mist dance from the essential oil infuser is also relaxing and meditative in its own way.

These simple observations awaken me to the natural flow of life, undisturbed ( or less disturbed) by human manipulation. Have you noticed how alive Spring has been this year? The birds seem more active, the trees more vibrant and the sky more dynamic. We are part of this cosmic dance, but usually are out of step with the rest of Gaia’s inhabitants.

Over the past few weeks I have thought about my former clients and what life has been like for them since the pandemic. To lose their therapist on top of everything else seems so unfair to me. But fairness is never a certainty. We can strive to be fair in our deeds and actions, but 3D life is not fair at all and may have been designed this way. I pray for my clients and hope they are getting all the support that they need.

I went back into therapy last year for a number of reasons, the primary one being that I was feeling sad at the end of 2018. It seemed prudent to get some support so I would not slide into a depression. While I took this step with ambivalence, I proceeded to find someone ( ” Angie ” ) local and affordable. I did not overthink this process and found someone rather quickly. She is an artist, lives closeby, and works in her home. She is older, very approachable and quite kind. Her home is an oasis, decorated the way I would if I took the time and care and had the resources. I felt safe there in this house with this person to be me, a therapist seeking therapy. I have not been in therapy for a very long time and was not sure how it would go. Ann’s style is very direct and expressive. She shares about her own life with deliberate intention. She chooses to show who she is and says it is becoming more mainstream to have less of a wall between client and clinician. Angie freely gives out articles and resources and is patient. She seemed to be a good choice for me. Imperfect, but certainly capable of holding space for my healing.

Last summer I went to her home for a session and no one was there. I called her after a few minutes went by and she told me she was in the hospital and would be there a few weeks. I was taken aback by this. Angie later divulged she developed leukemia and that treatment is complicated and lengthy. She offered me referrals if I wanted to see someone else. I decided to wait it out and she updated me on her progress. Eventually, we resumed our sessions and her health improved. I became very concerned about her health as she looked very tired and frail. It was a challenge for me to keep myself in the receiving role. Which is why I waited a while between visits. I told myself she would look healthier over time and this is my issue, not hers. When the pandemic happened, I knew I had to stay away and that I do not like zoom sessions. Ironic right, since I was providing telehealth to my clients. A couple of weeks ago after the layoff, I reached out because I needed to vent and get additional support. Imagine my horror when Angie emails me to say she is no longer practicing because she is dying. I wrote back to get clarity and Angie said the leukemia returned. I recall her telling me that if this happened she would not seek more treatment. I brushed her remark aside because the transplant was successful. Well, it was until it wasn’t.

I don’t know how to handle this. I have never gotten an email like this before and I feel abandoned. I do not want to find someone else. I want Angie to get better, yet I respect her choices. I just want the situation to be different. I will not know when she is dead and she could be already gone. I question the point of our brief time working together, that almost did not happen. I was not certain I wanted to open myself up again to a stranger. Was this loss more problematic than what brought me to her in the first place? I won’t know until much later when hindsight kicks in. It was suggested that I perform a ritual to help me mourn. Loss often has an aspect interruption within it. This relationship seems unfinished. And yet it is finished. Angie is true to herself and I appreciate that about her, along with her kindness, resilience from personal difficulties, and her honesty. I also admire how much she loved doing healing work. So many times she would share how lucky she is to be a therapist. Maybe because she chose it later in life and learned to appreciate her second career, or maybe because Angie just enjoyed helping others in this way. Her enthusiasm inspired me to try harder when I wasn’t excited about my work. The articles she gave me will remain part of my connection with her going forward.

One can say that living on Earth in a body always contains anticipatory grief to some degree. Our time here is finite and most of us do not get advance warning. It feels quite heavy to live with so many loose ends. But I will do the best that I can and writing is one form of therapy for me. Releasing my inner world this way is healing and comes naturally. I do not take this gift for granted. But there is more grieving to do.

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Pay It Forward 2020

Hey readers, followers and bloggers/blogettes,

Happy Friday! The weather is summery, the birds are chirping, and I am deciding to focus on the positive. I have plenty to be grateful for. I am happy to report my local Chinese place has reopened for takeout and they got all my special requests right, the staff was very friendly and the food was scrumptious! I have some leftovers and will savor them later.

I have said in previous posts that my life has become more bird forward. A recent change is that some birds are now hankering to come into my home. A few will fly right up to the sliding glass door and appear to knock on it. While I was not able to get footage for those occasions, I was able to get some more photos of a sparrow perhaps? hanging out on the terrace.

 

Another interesting cosmic wrinkle is the increasing frequency of word synchs. I will watch tv and the actor will say a word and it will show up on my FB feed. Or I will be typing a phrase and it will be repeated on YouTube. Sometimes the person speaking will repeat the word or phrase over and over to help it register in my awareness ( thank you!). Please reply in the comments if you also experience this phenomenon. I am not sure what to make of it, other than to notice that it occurs more often now than months before.

I have been thinking about how can I be useful while sidelined from work. What do I bring to the table that is unique and can benefit others at this time? How can I be of service? Well, the answer arrived and I am ready to share it with you now.

Starting immediately, I am offering free astro or intuitive readings by phone or video to anyone who reads this blog. It does not matter if I read for you before or if you just arrived here today “by accident”. All you have to do is contact me here and we will schedule a time. The scope of these readings will be how to be your best at this time. It does not have to be about the pandemic, but rather how can I assist you in seeing what may be hidden from view. If you choose an astro consult, I will need your birthdate, exact birth time ( if possible) and place of birth. No strings attached!

It would be cool though if you would pay forward some act of kindness or service to someone else. Not required, but certainly a great idea.

Let’s end this bizarre week with love and light and harmony and inclusion. I will do my best. Wanna join me?

namaste, litebeing

 

disclaimer –   In Line with Current US Legislation, I am obliged to make you aware of the fact that intuitive readings and astrological readings are completely for entertainment purposes only and that no liability will be accepted by myself for any course of action that you may take from the reading nor for any consequences arising from such action. My purpose is to help you find the right path to achieving your goals and finding your answers.  

Readings must not be submitted for Medical or Legal Advice as I am not an attorney or a doctor.  Please seek the correct licensed Professional for medical or legal advice. Do not base any actions in your life solely on the information given to you by a reader.  Please Be Aware:  You Are Responsible For Your Own Choices And Decisions That Arise From Any Reading You May Have. 

Do Nothing Now

wikipedia public domain

Remember when I posted back in January about moving forward with new pursuits? Now is the time to be still. I doubt this will be a change for most of us during this time of social distancing and global stay – at – home orders. Even for those who are back out in the “real world” ( or essential workers/heroes who never stayed home and kept us safe and secure), the stars require us to slow down and look inward. Three planets are stationing retrograde this week: first Saturn, then Venus, and finally, Jupiter. Many ask what will this planetary retro – dance look like? It is not something that can be easily answered. Some people will feel these energies and some will not notice anything. Three planets slowing down within days of each other is rare, but with all the chaos we find ourselves in, it is unlikely that most people will see any immediate changes. It has less to do with sensitivity and more to do with one’s astrological chart.

wikimedia public domain

For example, I have both Saturn and Jupiter currently moving through the 12th house in my natal chart and it is unlikely I will notice anything. Transiting Venus is conjoining my natal moon right now in the 4th house and I do expect that the Venus retrograde cycle will bring me experiences that are connected with women, nurturing, home, family or familiar people, and increased psychic activity. I will have to wait and see what transpires. Many times I have little awareness of planetary stations, especially while the cycle is active. Other times I do feel something immediately and powerfully at that.

Bottom line, I would suggest we all slow down, hold off on any major life decisions, and use this time to review, research, regroup,  reflect, reinvent,  revise, reinvigorate, relax, recapture, release, and recreate. Personally, I have often longed for a few weeks off to relax and regroup. But I never imagined that getting my wish would look like this! I expected that after a couple weeks post-layoff I would be busy with creative projects and new ventures. I was off track here because I have felt unwell for most of this at – home time. It has been two months since I called out sick on March 11th and have not been back at the office since. While working remotely I was exhausted per usual and did not really appreciate the benefits of staying home. Lately, I continue to be busy putting out financial and bureaucratic fires. I had been telling myself that my energy will perk up and I will start to make use of the quarantine once all the financial benefit glitches are straightened out. Recently it occurred to me that this type of thinking is similar to saying ” I will be happy once I move to a new home, or get a promotion, or lose 10 pounds, etc. ” I rather live life in a way that I won’t be bogged down by the necessary but tedious tasks that seem heavier now than before. Can you relate to this faulty thinking pattern? Let me know in the comments section.

wikimedia public domain

In the US, being busy equates with being happy. I was raised that way and many Americans do identify themselves with what they do, not who they are or who they are becoming. There is still some residue within me that resists the notion that everyone is created perfectly and need not take any action in order to be worthy of love. It is clear that I will have another chance to embrace the truth that all sentient beings are made of love with no further enhancements needed via acquisition or competition. We can choose to take action but are totally fine as we are. Let’s definitely settle down at this time and choose love.

A Whole New World?

As I ponder what to write for Barbara’s blogging challenging for a Magical New Earth, this song entered my awareness. Enjoy this post and contemplate what kind of world you want to co-create.

blessings, litebeing

litebeing chronicles

By Anne Dirkse (www.annedirkse.com) (Own work) [CC BY-SA 4.0 (http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-sa/4.0)], via Wikimedia Commons

Many have prophesied that one-third of our planet would be aligned with fifth dimensional consciousness by September 28, 2015. This is called the 1st wave of ascension.  I do not know if I feel any different. My experience of time and space has been altered for quite some time. According to Matt Kahn and others, this is not an intellectual exercise. It is all about the heart.

One way that I perceive insights is by noticing or attracting novel tidbits from pop culture. The internet is typically the medium that transmits these nuggets towards my awareness. Music and movies are two of my go-tos and this gem via Facebook got my attention. The film Aladdin is going to be released in digital format soon. To celebrate this new edition, the original singers from the film reunited on Good Morning America to sing A Whole New World. I am including the…

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Wednesday, Right? The bc Blues

More and more each day dissolves into the next. I wake up so many mornings feeling like there is no reason to get out of bed because my day will be almost the same as the last 10 or more. This is so different from previous unemployment episodes. I was at home more often, but I went out regularly and socialized and engaged with the outside world.

Days had distinction.

I remember what Wednesdays meant bc ( before Covid). I ran two groups back to back on Wednesday evenings and got home rather late at night. I was exhausted but also filled with the inner knowing that I was doing something, making a contribution to humanity.

So for the hell of it, let me share what I actually did today ~ 5-6-20, my half birthday.

I will be 60 years old in 6 months if I survive this monotony ( and the Presidential election).

Here are the “highlights ” :

I wished my friend a happy birthday on FB ( Happy Birthday Lynda if you are seeing this!)

I watched part of Morning Joe on MSNBC ( lately the MS/ Microsoft merger is really bothering me, but not enough to divorce me from tuning in to Morning Joe and Chuck Todd.)

I ate breakfast while watching more TV and playing video games. I spend part of most mornings playing a couple video games. I have done so for many years and made them part of my pre-work routine.  I like building virtual cities ; I must admit.

I sorta got dressed, depending on how you define dressed. I logged onto WP and read a few blogs, another daily ritual. I am here almost every day because it is home for me.

I prepared lunch and got into an email argument that lasted a few rounds. I ate lunch and watched part of the Young and The Restless, my go -to soap since around 1975 or so. Yes, we Scorpios can be loy-alle. The show is now airing “classic episodes ” since filming has ceased for now. About half of an episode is aired daily because programming is interrupted by city and NJ briefings. ( My state does not broadcast daily as far as I can tell, but NJ does). I also caught up on Mrs. America on Hulu. This series about the Women’s movement and the fight for the ERA in the 1970s is so fascinating. The acting is also impeccable. Check out Cate Blanchett. She was made for this role.

I must confess I have already forgotten a few hours of my day. Yeah, it was that interesting. I did complete my first mail-in ballot for the Presidential Primary and sent my mother a Mother’s Day card. Other than blogging, those tasks seemed to be the most productive.

I also had a “random ” in-person encounter. I rushed to fill out the ballot and card before the mail carrier arrived. Fortunately, the mail arrives here mid-afternoon now, rather than anywhere between 5 and 6 pm ( or later ) in the evening, like an afterthought. I was so excited and surprised to see the mail woman show up just as I walked out in the hall. I asked her if she could wait for me to address the card and she agreed, which was very kind. She has great long red hair and we talked awhile. She was very sweet and I felt grateful for this chance exchange ( as if anything is chance… )

I also spent way too much time checking email on my phone, expecting some message would arrive and rewrite my day. Maybe something along the lines of  ” You just won a million dollars ” or ” We want to make a movie about your life ” or ” This is just a dream ” and then I awaken to a bc reality.

I ate dinner and watched Becoming on Netflix. It was good, but I find it odd that it seems like I saw it already. Yet, how can that be if it was released today? I was thrilled to see glimpses of my city. Could it be because I don’t go anywhere anymore? I don’t typically venture downtown that much, maybe 5 times a year, but I was gleeful to see a SEPTA bus on the screen and some other local relics. Watch it if you like documentaries, as Michelle Obama’s transformation story is compelling.

Next I read a few sections of the Sunday NY Times ( promo deal made this affordable) and completed Decolonizing Wealth. This book was recommended and I got it because I thought it was about explaining the working-class Western world in terms of contemporary enslavement. It is not about that topic but it was still a good read. I came upon a lovely quote in the last chapter that begged to be shared.

When we are engaged in acts of love, we humans are at our best and most resilient. The love in romance that makes us want to be better people, the love of children that makes us want to change our whole lives to meet their needs, the love of family that makes us drop everything to take care of them,  the love of  community that makes us work tirelessly with broken hearts. Perhaps humans’ core function is love. “

So that was my day. Rather ordinary and not much different than Tuesday May 5, 2020. Yet, I was reminded about the power of love and this reminder inspired me to write today.

Love makes each day productive.