Green Butterfly/Symbols the Sequel

Happy Friday from couch central. I have been home for over three months and am finding life stranger and stranger. Today has been challenging. But Tuesday was magickal.

I have noticed old events repeating, which some may label as unpleasant. My car was damaged on the right side a few days ago by a hit and run. Different car, but this happened a few times already ( 2017, 2018). I have injured my toes, first on the right foot, and now on the left. I did a “bang-up job ” on the left pinky toe, all bruised and very painful. Yes, I have done this before, most notably back in 2018. I did it over and over for a few weeks back then.

The fun began this morning as my former manager contacts me to come in next week before my coworkers return to hand in company property and retrieve my stuff. He says he wants me to come in early due to social distancing. The real reason is he does not want me to speak to my colleagues, even though I was laid off and did nothing wrong. Today a neighbor called me ” the craziest neighbor” after I asked him not to walk next to me without a mask.  That stung, but I am not crazy, just conscious. Then I spotted 2 strangers walking around my car and parking lot suspiciously.  These events have sparked old wounds and triggered anger and fear. I feel attacked and I have also inadvertently hurt myself. It is eclipse season, with Merc retro and solstice upon us, but my 5th house of fun is highlighted, ha!

 

 

Well, there was some fun on Tuesday. I chose another symbol for Spirit to bring to me : a singing frog. He did not show up on Tuesday. On Wednesday I went to my FB feed and a friend ( who is a psychic) posted she was feeling froggy.  She then posted about frog symbolism.  One meaning of frog is finding opportunities during transition. Yes, that applies.

I commented on her post about my wish to see a singing frog. She then referred me to her profile picture and voila, my singing frog! I did not know about this animated character before. I did dig up this article about the urban meaning of a singing frog.

Here is the definition: A Singing Frog is the occurrence in which your attempt to show someone an ongoing symptom/ issue is squandered due to its coincidental absence. The post gives examples of signs that do not occur when you want to show someone else. It reminds me of why I sometimes write about my cosmic encounters, to document that what I observed really happened.

Which brings me to my little visitor. On Tuesday before the FB encounter, I was returning to my car with groceries feeling stressed. I noticed a tiny grasshopper on the trunk. I was excited and needed proof:

This photo was enlarged for detail, he or she was about 3/4 of an inch, if that. Later I returned to my car once home. I was doubtful but had to check to see if grasshopper( or cricket? ) had ridden home with me. He was still on the car, having traveled towards the passenger mirror. I did not have my phone on hand, but was fine just taking in the moment. I had a passing thought that my car is being protected, that all is well. The projection here is that I desire to be protected. My world does not feel safe and every time I cough, I worry I will get sick.

I realize I have been experiencing woo for decades, but I need to feel connected now more than ever. Over this 3 month period, I  experience loneliness, dread, and anger rising up. The manifestation of animal medicine or the appearance of images suggested as “an experiment” are needed for me to keep going. I need support to keep me from descending into a dark hole, can you see? We all must do what we can to reinforce the drive for self-preservation and to move closer to hope and the light.  May the light of universal love carry us when we cannot walk on our own.

HAPPY SOLSTICE TO ALL!

Here and There

I wonder if I am alone in feeling like time is slipping away and I have yet to unpack March. I do not really think I am the only one out there with this issue, but I am still highly sentimental and tend to take my time letting go.

Back in the winter, I decided to leave a scarf in my car in case I would feel cold while driving. We have reached close to 90 degrees recently and that scarf is still waiting in the passenger seat. The question is, is it waiting for me to bring it inside or waiting for winter to return? Let’s face it, in the blink of an eye, the summer will be over.  To quote Game of Thrones ” Winter is Coming! “ In many regards, winter never left. My work laptop idly sits on the dining room table, unused since April. I have no clue when my office will reopen and I will return to clean out my office space and hand in the keys and laptop. Perhaps once this happens I will be totally separated from my former employer. I wish I could have worn that scarf at least once. I also wish I could have my personal items back and be rid of the laptop, a reminder of another company with financial problems, using layoffs as a way to survive.

And yet, my intuition tells me that everything ought to remain as is, for now. I cannot say why ; I just feel it. I continue to learn how to be more okay with “what is”, especially when it causes discomfort or sadness. There is peace to be discovered in the alignment with NOW. I am not being all New Agey, I really do believe this. While little me is usually pissed off or impatient, higher self is totally down with taking life as it comes on its own terms.

Spring green has been replaced with summer green and that will have to be enough. I am excited to show you photos taken over the past few days ( including today). I had thought I had already shot some roses, but none made the cut. Hydrangea bloom about once every 2 years and 2020 is the year, woohoo!

As you take in the imagery, make some time to focus on the opalescence of the hydrangea,  the play of light and color contrast. If not now, when right?

By Syed Atif Nazir [GFDL (http://www.gnu.org/copyleft/fdl.html) or CC-BY-3.0 (http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/3.0)], via Wikimedia Commons

Gemini Dream

I am happy to report that my mood and attitude have improved for the past few days. Meditating daily using headspace has made a difference. I have also participated in a global meditation yesterday as well, thanks to Alia. The accompanying video is uplifting with glorious music. Check out Alia’s blog for more details as this meditation is still happening.

Today’s eclipse is on 15 degrees Sagittarius, near my Venus in my 10th house. The Gemini / Sag polarity is about information, religiosity, ideas, philosophy, teaching, and communication, among other things. This Gem sun – Sag moon combo can produce a slick, fanatical salesman/woman type with lots of bluster and pretty words. Words do matter as well as how we use them. Venus in my 10th house points to the value of public life. At least that is one interpretation that speaks to my current situation. Doing as astro consult on Wednesday was wonderful as I was able to hear someone derive meaning from my words in real-time.  I have another lined up and invite you to join the party! These readings are free. Click here for the details.

Yesterday I began a volunteer job and it is very exciting. It happened very quickly and rather organically. More will be revealed in due time, but let’s just say that I thrive when I feel useful. I realize one’s worth is not defined by doing anything, but I like being part of the healing collective, the souls who find meaning in service. My face and hands are improving slowly and I have fewer aches and pains. My emotions are still raw and my patience is lacking, but I am noticing an improvement in my outlook. While I enjoy leisure and would never be called a workaholic, I have 2 planets in Capricorn and Venus in the 10th. Moreover, Saturn is the traditional ruler of my chart. For me, this manifests as loyalty, duty, and productivity, an antidote to my lazyish Pisces south node ( where I could escape into books, tv, and video games for days).

My dreams have been odd, but I attribute to my delicate nervous system adapting to a chaotic new “normal. ” I will not predict how this Strawberry Moon lunar eclipse ( the 1st of 3) will fare, but it does coincide with Trump’s luminaries. Please consider a free reading with me for a look at your near future and/or adding a testimonial for a past reading for my Testimonial page. I am revamping it so it will be more user friendly when I step up my Astrology practice. Dream well and communicate with love.

images by Josephine Wall

A Whole New World?

As I ponder what to write for Barbara’s blogging challenging for a Magical New Earth, this song entered my awareness. Enjoy this post and contemplate what kind of world you want to co-create.

blessings, litebeing

litebeing chronicles

By Anne Dirkse (www.annedirkse.com) (Own work) [CC BY-SA 4.0 (http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-sa/4.0)], via Wikimedia Commons

Many have prophesied that one-third of our planet would be aligned with fifth dimensional consciousness by September 28, 2015. This is called the 1st wave of ascension.  I do not know if I feel any different. My experience of time and space has been altered for quite some time. According to Matt Kahn and others, this is not an intellectual exercise. It is all about the heart.

One way that I perceive insights is by noticing or attracting novel tidbits from pop culture. The internet is typically the medium that transmits these nuggets towards my awareness. Music and movies are two of my go-tos and this gem via Facebook got my attention. The film Aladdin is going to be released in digital format soon. To celebrate this new edition, the original singers from the film reunited on Good Morning America to sing A Whole New World. I am including the…

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Wake Me Up Before I Go – Go

In preparation for my future submission to Barbara’s next free E-Book about A Magical New Earth, I am posting my entry to the 3rd installment of the True Awakening Series. Free downloads for all 3 Awakening PDF E -Books are located on the right column of my blog home page. Enjoy!

litebeing chronicles

Here is my contribution to A Selection of True Awakening Stories, Part III, created and organized by the magnificent Barbara. Thanks to my dear friend Barbara for making this all possible and gently nudging me to dig deeper into my being and scoop out some goodies to convert into the written word!

This project will be converted to a free e-book for all to enjoy and savor with glee. The previous two e-books are available for download on the right sidebar of my site’s home page.

I would suggest you read or re-read my previous two awakening stories listed below to gain a broader understanding of my journey:

Part I

Part II

This third installment will cover my “travels” from early 2016 until this present moment. While not much has really changed at the surface level, there has been tremendous energetic shifts just below the surface. Many of…

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Answer the Call

Close to five years later, this video is still on point.
Feeling low, agitated, frustrated, hurt? Listen to the message, it is ON!
namaste ❤

litebeing chronicles

I am in love with this video. It is a rap ascension video. Yes, you read this right! It is like no-thing I have ever heard.  It latched onto my heart and my soul grinned in agreement. Then he mentioned being a Scorpio!

Enough said. Time to listen.

header image ~ wikipedia.org, public domain

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Book Review : The Little Soul and the Sun

litebeing’s note: I have re-posted a section of a blog I wrote in 2014 to showcase this book review. It just occurred to me that if we truly want to save this planet and each other, we need to be kinder, forgive more, resent less, and become more open to each other. This is not about the “other”, rather it is about recognizing there is no one outside of ourselves. Separation is an illusion. This children’s book is truly a gift to all children of Creation, reminding us to see the Divine everywhere and all-ways.

It was nearly fourteen years ago when I first was introduced to The Little Soul and the Sun by Neale Donald Walsch.  After gazing at it on Amazon for a long time ( could not find it offline), I finally ordered it.  The package arrived a few days ago and we had a joyous reunion! To read it again after all this time is so empowering and certain passages triggered a profound crying spell. These were tears of recognition of the power of the Source and my longing for that complete connection. Shortly after I had my awakening during the Summer of 2005 I returned to a very chaotic work situation. Many people had moved on and the entire leadership team of my department was in flux. One of my supervisors ( one of the few who remained) was led to bring me a book to borrow. He had never done so before. He came to my cubicle and said that he wanted me to read this book because it will help me deal with a very difficult dilemma. He handed me this children’s book. I am thinking ” Why is he giving me a children’s book?” When I saw that the author was Neale Donald Walsch, creator of the Conversation with God series, I was happy to dig in.

This beautifully illustrated tale is about the purpose of the human experience and the contracts we make with one another in order to help us fulfill our unique expression of the Divine. It tells the tale of one soul who wanted to live the wonder of his being through physical expression on Earth and chose to experience the nature of forgiveness. This short story succinctly explains the role of darkness in the Universe and why this physical world is ” all pretend.” It is indeed a children’s book, but I enjoyed it as much or more than many of the heady metaphysical material that I pore through on a regular basis. The main theme is to forgive one another for any perceived wrongdoing and to recognize that we are all loving beings of light.

I understood the reason my supervisor lent me this book, yet I was unable to forgive this coworker who was to play a powerful role in my workgroup. I did not have the support necessary to deal with her daily, and look beyond her current persona that was quite untrustworthy and manipulative. While I understood that a great life lesson was before me, I simply was unprepared to take this challenge on. Not at this time.

I ultimately used this situation to once and for all make a clean break from a system that I had outgrown. This coworker actually did me a huge favor by being a catalyst that set these events in motion. By the way, I  lent my supervisor Dan Millman’s The Way of the Peaceful Warrior in exchange for his kind gesture.  It was the least I could do!

I highly recommend this book to anyone who wants a major heart-opening. This may seem paradoxical to many, but often the simpler texts teach me more about life than the scholarly ones. Perhaps this is why I am so drawn to poets like Rumi. He packed millennia of lifetimes condensed into mere sentences. Sometimes less is more. Check out Sindy’s post here to read the entire story!

May we all become wiser, stronger, more conscious and kinder to ourselves and everyone who crosses our path.

book image courtesy of amazon.com

Sick Day Summary

It has been so long since I have published anything original. Working 4 ten hour days a week ( including evenings) has left me tired or depleted energetically more often than not. I think about this blog and community often and I want you all to know you are with me every step of the way.

The way has been busy and productive but tinged with loneliness, anxiety, and dread. I am grateful to have a job I enjoy where I can see what I have helped create. Yet I feel very insecure, waiting for the other shoe to drop. I am lucky to have people I can discuss my worries with, but it is not always enough. So many years of underemployment or unemployment have left me shaky and uneasy. With both transiting Pluto and Saturn trudging around my 12th house, I understand where some of this malaise is rooted. But still, it persists.

My relationship with my mother remains fractured and this saddens me, and yet, it seems to be more real. I try to balance my awareness of her advancing age with my need to let her know that we have mostly been strangers to one another throughout our entire relationship.  I work on remaining careful not to hurt her and still communicate as directly and plainly as I can. I want to be the bigger person but it is difficult when I am the bigger person all over my life. There are so few people who can comfort me and hear me and really accept me just as I am. So I strive to be that person for me. Learning to love yourself IS the greatest love of all.

I called out sick today and it was much needed. I am happy to report my body is on the mend, so my choice to stay home was a sound one. With Mercury retrograde, I still had to spend unwanted time contacting colleagues because of communication breakdowns.  I have been feeling so tired lately. The astro weather isn’t helping either. My uncle died and my boss quit his job within days of each other during this eclipse cycle.  Two different events; one natural, the other seemingly unexpected. I recently concluded my uncle was the last male relative of the generation before mine.  I did not know him well. We were not close, but he is a symbol of my childhood and he was a decent man. Uranus most likely messed with his Taurus sun, but he lived a long life, seemingly content.

My boss is one of the nicest supervisors I have ever worked with. Spoiler alert: when I am fortunate enough to get a great boss, they usual resign shortly after I am hired. He stayed for almost 6 months of my tenure and that is a record. He is a double Pisces, so of course, we got along. He has his faults, but he is so good with people, so kind, and so caring. A real lightworker. I did not see his resignation coming, but here it is. I have a history of scary supervisors replacing the nice ones, but I can rewrite this old narrative. In fact, I already have: ” I have learned so much about this new job setting and mastered so many new tasks while working with this person. He believes in me and is not afraid to be complimentary and recognize hard work. I saw how authority does not have to be used to gain power and control. I appreciate the time I worked with him and the impact he has made.”

I am grieving him, even while he still is working with me for a few more weeks. I assumed I would leave before he would. Oh well, I was mistaken. I do not do loss well, but over time I have been able to let go sooner and easier. This is growth. Speaking of loss, I have had a few dreams lately featuring my first cat Jasmine. I have no digital pictures of her to post, but I can describe her as a petite calico with green eyes. She was gorgeous and independent and aloof. But she was my first baby and I adopted her at about 7 weeks old. She lived with me for 16 years. Dexter was bigger than life, but Jasmine taught me about how to nurture another. It is curious why she is emerging in dreamtime, but it is cool to see her again happy and thriving.

This catchup post is a hodgepodge of topics, quickly assembled from the recesses of my mind and heart, but it feels liberating to share my ramblings with you on this cooler than usual July evening. So much remains uncertain, but one idea rings true: service with passion equals a full heart and warm soul.

MICHELLE WALLING: “The False Matrix Mission Trick”

Not surprisingly, whatever we focus on multiplies. Here is a post on Soul Mission that resonates with me and my blog challenge rather strongly. I do not agree with all of it, nor is that required.  Michelle makes some strong points, especially about specialness and spiritual bypass.

In light, litebeing

Ascension Avatar

A popular false light tactic is to make you feel like you are a “chosen one”, with a mission that is above all else, including human relationships and love. Many people jump into healing, websites, and channeling without doing the inner work first, because a “guide” came to them with a message.

We are the ultimate creators, and when we are still operating and creating from lower vibrations EVERYTHING gets distorted. That is the nature of the reality of the matrix. Everything is backward and upside down, and the truth is that we created it that way. Now it is time to un-create. First we have to recognize what needs to be un-created, and in this case, it is distortion. Distorted healing methods, distorted guides and messengers, and most of all, distorted focus on your true mission.

You are here to BE LOVE IN A HUMAN BODY, which trumps all…

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A Heartful of Wonder

I have created this piece for my Divine Mission-Possible blogging challenge. Visit here for all the details and to see the schedule. Interest in participation has been low this time around. But you can change that in an instant!

Please join us now and make this year’s challenge the best one yet!

This topic of life mission is an easy one for me to address because I ruminate about it all the time. As I entered middle age and witnessed the loss of many of my friends’ parents and many of my relatives, the grip of time became tighter. Time continues to speed up so fast that when I plan events many months in advance, I recognize that they will arrive in what appears to be only a week or two. So what have I done so far and is there a point to my existence?  I have felt quite depressed for the past few weeks, considering if I have veered way off course. It is so tempting to focus solely on the regrets, errors, losses, pain, and disappointment.  But such a narrow perspective can be a distraction from where this sea of memories has transported me thus far.

I was a very quiet, reserved child who felt different and in the way somehow. I spent plenty of my days passively observing the world around me. My sensitivity, curiosity and imagination have been profoundly obvious from the start and it took me some practice to cultivate the gifts they could provide. The ability to delight in the grace of artistry have given me comfort beyond description. When I was able to transcend early despair and woundedness, I could access joy through a kaleidoscopic lens.

So much pain created so much chaos, but the correct people and opportunities presented me with the ability to discover what moved me. Writing, astrology, and spelling of all things, taught me how to channel my imagination, wonder, and visual acuity into form. I think that I was a great speller because I had an uncanny ability to visualize words. I no longer possess that ability, but excelling and competing in spelling gave me confidence that was sorely needed as a child.

The rocky cliffs of Étretat by Monet.jpg

My love of beauty led me to draw as my curiosity led to studying astrology. Drawing still relaxes me and conversing with a client about their birth chart brings all the analysis and attention to symbols and patterns to life. It is so natural to understand why certain aspects of mysticism are effortless to me now. I honestly prefer what comes easily to me, but that is not what I apparently signed up for. If earthly life could only be an impressionist painting, waiting for me to dive in and immerse my soul in its delicacy and shimmering rays of bliss?

I do relate to the idea of a lightworker and have for quite a good while. I was around before the harmonic convergence, before ” New Age ” became a thing. I was coming into my own during the swirling, hazy Seventies, where the experimentation and boundary blurring of the Sixties had shaped our Western world through a technicolor lifestyle. I decided while in high school that I wanted to become a therapist and a writer, and make my impact on brightening up the planet. Like many of us, I longed to fix the brokenness around me and inside me. I retain some of that idealism, but am much more incarnation-fatigued than ever before.

I came here to heal, teach, inspire and share cumulative knowledge through the occult, psychic/intuitive abilities,  creative impulses and wit. Yeah, I came in naturally witty ( Moon in Gemini). It has taken decades to see a clear path through my lineage and probable past lifetimes here and elsewhere. While the specifics are not absolute, the residue has led me to this conclusion. I am not certain about all the other labels we humans like to give ourselves, but I have been taught since my twenties that the planet would be transforming in a radical way. I do not have distinct memories of planning this lifetime, nor am I being informed of this by guides. Working on myself and serving others has provided me with this inner knowing.

all of these paintings under impressionist heading wikipedia pub domain

Am I grateful to be alive here and now? Not usually, no. The past 6 years or so have been incredibly terrifying and heart wrenching for me a good deal of the time. I have written extensively about the difficulties so I will not rehash them again. The grip on my neck is tightening and the stakes are higher. Or they seem to be. I am not always clear on how much more hardship is in store for us individually or universally. I do feel that I am on a mission and that without all the early blows and ancestral damage, the motivation may not have been in full force. I have read from several sources that old-time lightworkers lost their way because they became inundated with the harshness of the material overlay that can hinder the development of consciousness. I know this is true for me. But I have not given up, not entirely. On countless occasions, an unexpected, often subtle sign would appear, helping my melt away my despair, albeit temporarily. The more I love, the more my heart opens. The more vulnerable I allow myself to remain, the greater is the likelihood of pain and grief to penetrate my soul. But here’s the thing; my soul is so much bigger than little I, so much stronger than this body that I am renting by the hour. So I do the best I can, and when I need to rest, I rest. A full heart is a mixed blessing, but in the unlimited realms from where we all originate(and currently reside in parallel realities), blessings are infinite.

images courtesy of wikipedia.org, public domain