Nature Rocks

Communion with the natural world is how I do mysticism best ( or better at the very least). My heart opens so wide when I connect with cats, birds, light on a leaf, a pink sunset, etc. My experiences the past month or so have been interesting. On several occasions, I have caught a quick glimpse of a creature or two; an intense flash of movement, so easily dismissed and unlikely to register with the typical busy human be-ing.


Driving home a few nights ago, I saw a solitary deer retreat back towards the woods. ( Photos above were taken in March in my backyard). A few days ago I opened my front door to witness about 8 sparrows fly up from the bushes in unison. Last week I spotted a rare for this area black and blue butterfly move around my car. I remember seeing one like it last August as well. We do not get many butterfly varieties in my neck of the woods, so this was a treat. I consciously set an intention for this beauty to fly back to the car. And I waited. A few minutes. And it did not return.

Fast forward to yesterday right before work as I sit on the couch and watch some TV. A black and blue butterfly flies towards the terrace. There are no plants or flowers there so I do not know what the draw was. I watched it dance around the perimeter of the terrace. Then I noticed it take root on the green mat on the terrace floor. It rested there and fluttered its wings. I rushed to take a picture, wondering if it would allow me to snap a shot. It appeared to see me, but stayed on the map, in a  butterfly “resting pose.” This lovely creature hung out on my terrace for close to an hour. I took a few shots over the course of 30 minutes.

Isn’t she lovely? Looks like my wish was granted from a few days earlier. This truly felt like a blessing from the Divine, as the butterfly held space for me. It reminded me of my grasshopper giventure a few years back. The photography is not award-winning, but it documents our sweet communion.

Sometimes it is the simple moments that give us all we need if we just take the time to remain quiet and open.

How has your week been?

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You Have a Writer’s Energy

Greeting litebeings and welcome to all the new followers! Thank you for taking the time to visit this site and check out my musings, stories, and whatever Spirit brings forth from this vessel. I have a moon in Pisces blessing to share with you tonight.

Most readers know that my outer life has been consumed by work, adjusting to an odd schedule and accommodating an endless array of shifting demands and circumstances. I can truly say I love working with my clients, so I guess it is worth the effort to shapeshift as best I can.

Yet I yearn for the mystery that resides in my inner life, where Source resides and the divine spark is lit. Tonight I can report that a spark was present last night ( Friday).  After a very busy and exhausting week, I was delighted to park my car and walk towards my door.  Before I could do so, I was greeted by two neighbors with their collective dogs. I was feeling quite disengaged and made quick small talk without missing a beat. When a neighbor made a comment that saddened me, I retorted ” I work as a therapist and when I come home, I want to leave the negativity behind. ” ( or something to that effect. ) I do not know these neighbors well, and since I do not have dogs, I am not part of that crowd. So as I was walking to my apartment, the female neighbor ( we’ll call her Andrea) shouted out ” So do you practice CBT? ” and I am thinking ” What? ” I just want to watch some TV and chill. But I answer her and was surprised she knew about CBT (Cognitive Behavioral Therapy). Andrea responded she once was a therapist but could not deal with the transference. She has lived upstairs for at least two years and I know nothing about her or her husband. Andrea seemed compelled to share more and more about her life. While it was interesting, I wanted to be alone with my thoughts.

Then she asked ” Are you published? ” I found that an odd question. I asked her if she was published because often people will ask others about topics that interest them personally. Apparently Andrea is getting her Ph.D.  in Education and her dissertation is almost complete. I told her I blog but have not published anything professionally.  She matter of factly declares ” I had thought you were a writer. ” This was strange since we never had a conversation before and barely say hello in passing. I wondered why she had arrived at this conclusion and she said that she’s an empath and reads people well.   ” You have a writer’s energy.” I was surprised she was spot on and quipped that since writing has always been my passion that perhaps I should step up my game. I took a good look at Andrea and the two small dogs she was cradling like babies. The dogs looked so gentle and sweet. How could I have not seen them before as they are? How could Andrea see me as I am so easily?  I suggested we talk again and she replied that they are relocating in about one month.

It occurred to me that I quickly dismiss people if they don’t quickly meet some arbitrary set of criteria that I subconsciously create. I make assumptions and filter out most people as mundane or mainstream or simply not interesting.  I rely on my perception to show me who and what to focus on. I avoid most dog people because I am a cat person and don’t really get dogs. Maybe my filtration system needs an upgrade. I wonder how many other people and situations I have overlooked in my desire to become less overstimulated by the outer world.  It is not a self-judgment as I understand that I do not have time to completely slow down and take in all of my environment. Yet, there is a lesson here for me to learn.

I really like the idea of having a writer energy, whatever that means. This was clearly a mystical moment; she could not have conjured up her impression randomly. She does not look like an empath, but even as I write this, I realize an empath does not have a look.

Speaking of perception and looking at things Wayne Dyer style, I have some lovely pieces to share with you from last week’s visit to the Philadelphia Museum of Art. Enjoy!

Don’t you just love moon in Pisces evenings?

 

all images courtesy of litebeing chronicles © 2019

Sick Day Summary

It has been so long since I have published anything original. Working 4 ten hour days a week ( including evenings) has left me tired or depleted energetically more often than not. I think about this blog and community often and I want you all to know you are with me every step of the way.

The way has been busy and productive but tinged with loneliness, anxiety, and dread. I am grateful to have a job I enjoy where I can see what I have helped create. Yet I feel very insecure, waiting for the other foot to drop. I am lucky to have people I can discuss my worries with, but it is not always enough. So many years of underemployment or unemployment have left me shaky and uneasy. With both transiting Pluto and Saturn trudging around my 12th house, I understand where some of this malaise is rooted. But still, it persists.

My relationship with my mother remains fractured and this saddens me, and yet, it seems to be more real. I try to balance my awareness of her advancing age with my need to let her know that we have mostly been strangers to one another throughout our entire relationship.  I work on remaining careful not to hurt her and still communicate as directly and plainly as I can. I want to be the bigger person but it is difficult when I am the bigger person all over my life. There are so few people who can comfort me and hear me and really accept me just as I am. So I strive to be that person for me. Learning to love yourself IS the greatest love of all.

I called out sick today and it was much needed. I am happy to report my body is on the mend, so my choice to stay home was a sound one. With Mercury retrograde, I still had to spend unwanted time contacting colleagues because of communication breakdowns.  I have been feeling so tired lately. The astro weather isn’t helping either. My uncle died and my boss quit his job within days of each other during this eclipse cycle.  Two different events; one natural, the other seemingly unexpected. I recently concluded my uncle was the last male relative of the generation before mine.  I did not know him well. We were not close, but he is a symbol of my childhood and he was a decent man. Uranus most likely messed with his Taurus sun, but he lived a long life, seemingly content.

My boss is one of the nicest supervisors I have ever worked with. Spoiler alert: when I am fortunate enough to get a great boss, they usual resign shortly after I am hired. He stayed for almost 6 months of my tenure and that is a record. He is a double Pisces, so of course, we got along. He has his faults, but he is so good with people, so kind, and so caring. A real lightworker. I did not see his resignation coming, but here it is. I have a history of scary supervisors replacing the nice ones, but I can rewrite this old narrative. In fact, I already have: ” I have learned so much about this new job setting and mastered so many new tasks while working with this person. He believes in me and is not afraid to be complimentary and recognize hard work. I saw how authority does not have to be used to gain power and control. I appreciate the time I worked with him and the impact he has made.”

I am grieving him, even while he still is working with me for a few more weeks. I assumed I would leave before he would. Oh well, I was mistaken. I do not do loss well, but over time I have been able to let go sooner and easier. This is growth. Speaking of loss, I have had a few dreams lately featuring my first cat Jasmine. I have no digital pictures of her to post, but I can describe her as a petite calico with green eyes. She was gorgeous and independent and aloof. But she was my first baby and I adopted her at about 7 weeks old. She lived with me for 16 years. Dexter was bigger than life, but Jasmine taught me about how to nurture another. It is curious why she is emerging in dreamtime, but it is cool to see her again happy and thriving.

This catchup post is a hodgepodge of topics, quickly assembled from the recesses of my mind and heart, but it feels liberating to share my ramblings with you on this cooler than usual July evening. So much remains uncertain, but one idea rings true: service with passion equals a full heart and warm soul.

A Walk on the New Leo Moon with Jupiter in Leo and Mars in Scorpio

Yes, I was there ( not on the moon, but watching on TV) and it is hard to imagine that 50 years have gone by. Enjoy this reblog as we memorialize ” One Small Step…. “

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Welcome to the glorious radiant Leo New Moon with Jupiter newly ensconced in Leo to boot! I began the celebration by changing my domain name to litebeing.com.

Mars just entered Scorpio after a 8 month foray in Libra. Libra is my solar 12 house so let’s just say between this and transiting Saturn restricting my Neptune Sun Mercury, I am more than ready for the arrival of new energies.

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 Jupiter is so beautiful and boundless. While it is exalted in Cancer, I do prefer it in Leo. It will be especially beneficial when it leaves my 6th house and enters the 7th where Uranus in Leo, my chart ruler, resides. Take a look at where Leo is placed in your chart to gauge how Sun/ Moon/ Jupiter in Leo may enlighten and brighten your life.

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Leo is regal, fixed, ego-directed, fun-loving, joyous and bursting with creative energy. As a…

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By Smithsonian Institution via Wikimedia Commons

The Mountain Astrologer ~The Music Issue Review

UPDATE: Tem Tarriktar, the creator of the Mountain Astrologer, died a few days ago. I began reading this iconic magazine around 1990 , 3 years after its inception in 1987. This time frame coincided with my first Saturn Return when I became acquainted with a community of local astrologers.

TMA, which I would call ” The Astrology Bible” has become such  an important part of my life for an entire Saturn cycle. While I did not know Tem personally, we did correspond a few years back when I heard about the need for reviews of the Music Issue. I responded to a Facebook invitation for bloggers to get the word out. I found him to be warm, kind, and engaging.

Many of my friends and astro-heroes write for TMA and I wondered if one day I may join them. Several years ago I was so excited to see a coworker’s chart featured in a regular feature where a few experts took a shot at a person’s questions about love, career, etc. I knew the chart well since I had given this coworker a reading when I supervised her while we worked at the City together. None of these connections would have been possible without Tem’s vision.

I am re-posting my original review of TMA’s Music Issue for your enjoyment and as a tribute to Tem. My astro community has taken some hits recently with the losses of a few beloved astrologers. However, we will continue to prosper and grow from the knowledge and dedication of those luminaires that paved the way for us so brilliantly.

Thanks to you and Godspeed Tem! ❤

 

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 I am such a huge fan of The Mountain Astrologer and have kept most of my old issues for later reference. No one does what they do and I cannot imagine practicing or studying astrology today without this amazing resource. Many of you know how much joy music brings to my life. I have often used song to illustrate my moods and current planetary weather. This Special Music Issue of TMA takes two of my passions, music and astrology, and bring them together with skill and soul.

I am happy to share my impressions here and hope you will buy this issue and/or become a subscriber to TMA.

TMA Music Issue Review ~

The Mountain Astrologer Strikes the Right Note

This issue is truly remarkable and will be a keepsake in your astrological library. Guest Editor Frank Clifford did a fantastic job assembling such a comprehensive line up of material. There really is something for every music lover. The material is so diverse in terms of musical genres, the artists themselves, and individual writing styles. From Eartha Kitt to Miley Cyrus and everyone in between, this special edition has got you covered.

For those who are not familiar with The Mountain Astrologer ( TMA), this bimonthly publication offers feature articles for every level of expertise, a dedicated student section, book reviews, software reviews, forecasts and hilarious astro comics. The music issue contains both thematic articles and musician – centered pieces on Marilyn Manson, Captain Beefheart, and Phil Spector. The crowning jewel of the collection is Frank Clifford’s Astro-Chronology of Pop Music 1956- 2011. This 2 page centerfold is a love letter to the astrology and music lover; documenting the song of each year, critical dates in music history, significant planetary conjunctions, and more.

Let’s now take a look at some of the featured articles. Neil Spencer’s piece on The Astrology of Pop is a fascinating ride that takes the reader through the major planetary influences of popular music.TMA414p25 He demonstrates how each Jupiter- Uranus cycle influences the pulse of pop culture and how the music produced reflects the language of that particular point in time. He references Richard Tarnas and I especially like this quote :

A tendency in culture for events and figures that played roles in Jupiter-Uranus alignments to possess a mythologized, legendary aura … evoked to the point where they became iconic.

Think of luminaries such as Charlie Parker, Frank Sinatra, Elvis Presley, and Jimi Hendrix ( riding the wave of both the Jupiter Uranus and Uranus Pluto conjunctions) and one cannot the deny the symmetry between the movements of the cosmic heavy- hitters and musical genius.

Kelly Surtees does a stellar job analyzing the effects of transits to the artist’s natal aspects with their signature songs in The Singer and the Song. Stevie Wonder’s Superstition, for example, is examined here with regards to Uranus transiting his natal Ascendant, Neptune, and the Moon (instrumentation) and Neptune transiting his natal Jupiter (lyrics). This article does an outstanding job highlighting how an era shapes the musician’s persona, which in turn produces iconic hits that leave an indelible mark on the musical landscape.

Another gem is The Moon, the Musician, and the Listening Public by Lynn Bell. Bell takes a look at the impact of highly sensitive and enigmatic Moon in Pisces artists such as Frank Sinatra, Joni Mitchell, and Michael Jackson on the public. Then the Moon Pluto crowd ~ Madonna, Lady Gaga, and Miley Cyrus, is explored though the lens of power upon the individual singer and collective. Music is such an intimate, emotional experience and the allure of the Moon, Neptune( Pisces), and Pluto is undeniably powerful in the charts of these performers.

In addition to all the excellent material already mentioned, two other articles are mandatory reading. Within seconds of thumbing through the issue, the words Are You Psychic ? catch my eye. “Why, of course” I say to myself as I take a closer look. It turns out to be a fascinating piece on outer planets and metaphysical abilities by Donna Cunningham. In Are You Psychic? The Outer Planets and Paranormal Abilities, Cunningham, a TMA regular contributor and WordPress blogger at Sky Writer, does a wonderful job pinpointing which astrological signatures frequently show up in mediums, psychics, and healers. She uses Sylvia Browne’s chart to illustrate how the collective energies of Uranus, Neptune, and Pluto can manifest in various paranormal gifts. Anyone fascinated with the spiritual realms will come back to this article time and time again. I know that this will be a treasured resource for many years to come.

I also enjoyed Sandra Leigh Serio’s take on pre natal eclipses. In The Pre Natal Eclipse in Your Natal Chart, she explains how to find your pre-eclipse point and its association with past lives and soul groups Then she uses the Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie synastry to illustrate how it manifests. I became so engaged with the information that I quickly looked up my own pre-natal eclipse point and compared it with those of my inner circle. I highly recommend that you check this out if you want to investigate how reincarnation can impact your current relationships for better or worse.

If you have not read TMA before, you have so much to look forward to, and might I add, plenty of catching up to do! The Music Issue is a great place to start, chock full of original, in-depth research and invaluable musical memorabilia. This once in a lifetime compilation is available in both print and digital formats.

 

The Mountain Astrologer ~ ordering info :

Print subscriptions (includes free digital access): www.mountainastrologer.com/order.html

Digital-only subs: www.mountainastrologer.com/members/welcome

email : subs@mountainastrologer.com

Neptune Retrograde ~ End of the Line

Happy Neptune Retrograde! Yes, another re-tread but with an update. I wrote this post about 1 year ago. Fast forward to now and I am also working in addictions, doing groups, with mostly males. I reinstated the Friday music exercise with a few adjustments. The interpretations of this transit remain the same. Go with the flow, slow down, and find your internal GPS.

love to all, litebeing

litebeing chronicles

This has not been an easy time, but when has it ever been easy? While  transiting Jupiter retrograded back on my natal Sun over the past few days, I spent most of the time physically ill and/or exhausted. Astrology is complicated and sometimes transits do not show up in a standard way. The late Donna Cunningham wrote about this topic and postulated that often astrological transits trigger internal events, even when it looks like they ought to be external.

I am not certain, but what I do know is how grateful I feel when the pain subsides or when I am able to just let go and be with the pain. How can we know sweet without bitter, light without dark? In the material world, duality is here to teach us the range of creation. Lately, I have noticed that more nudges have appeared, bringing into focus the complexity of…

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Gratitude at Solstice

Happy Solstice everyone! Good Morning Starshine! Here’s to celebrating the light within and without.

https://youtu.be/NF7dKUz-Q7M

litebeing chronicles

Happy Summer Solstice in the Northern Hemisphere and Happy Winter Solstice in the Southern Hemisphere! I am grateful to have readers all over the globe who grace me with their presence. One of many things I am grateful for.

I plan to use today to impart a radical gratitude practice. I do this now, rather than stew in all my problems or disappointments. In his new book, Everything is Here to Help You, Matt Kahn espouses that every circumstance will help us bring about more love for ourselves and each other. I much rather conclude that Source is conspiring for me, rather than against me.

I can feel the increase of light and warmth and am drinking it in. I live in such a beautiful neighborhood and am so lucky to be surrounded by trees and creatures of all kinds. As dusk approaches, my thoughts begin to settle down…

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Seeing Ain’t Believing

Ever since Ascension has become a hot topic in metaphysical/spiritual circles, I have wondered if some or all of my odd physiological ailments were due to upgrades or plain 3D aging. I still do not have any clear answers, but figured the current Sun square Neptune aspect was a great time to explore this latest mystery.

Back in March, I had just begun a new job which included working nights. My night vision is not so hot and my eyes tire after spending long hours in front of a computer screen. About 20 minutes after arriving home one night, I tune into a favorite TV series. It is hard to follow the storyline because there is a disco ball flashing inside my head. At least that is what it looks like to me. For close to half an hour I see gold lights quickly flashing  within my field of vision, in both eyes. I was really scared, but hoping for the best outcome. After freaking a few years back after the floaters arrived, I decided not to panic. I told myself that if this incident was a ” one and done”, there would be no need to take action. The floaters, ( dark shadowy figures that enter from the corner of the eye) turned out to be nothing, according to my ophthalmologist. So this weirdness dissipated, never to return. But when a Facebook friend posted about eye flashes and retinal surgery, I went into panic mode. I saw the new doctor ( as mine had retired) who minimized the whole affair and concluded my retinas were fine before she examined them. She diagnosed me with ocular migraines and claimed I have a history of them. ( No I did not, I had old- fashioned migraine headaches; I would have remembered an in-house disco show.) Ocular migraines are “brain farts” that show up in the field of vision, related to auras that some people experience before experiencing a migraine episode. I have not seen auras yet, neither the migraine kind or the energy – field observed above one’s crown chakra variety.

A few weeks after the ophthalmologist visit, I saw a light green light on someone’s jacket at work. I surmised it was a reflection from something outside the window. When I noticed the same colored light the next morning in the bathroom, I panicked. ” Why am I seeing colors that are not there? ” I do not use magic mushrooms or take acid or other hallucinogens. I am not sleep deprived nor am I losing my mind. I was worried I might be losing my eyesight though. So I called the ophthalmologist office and told the assistant about my symptoms. She called back after consulting with the doctor and assured me this is an ocular migraine. I did not recall being told during my checkup that seeing colors was another possible sign of an ocular migraine. Did you know that this type of migraine is not related to the eyes but to the visual cortex part of the brain?

Apparently, this phenomenon is rare, which makes sense to me. I tend to develop odd or rare health issues ( Aquarius rising with an angular Uranus and strong Saturn in Capricorn). But it does beg the question, why now? Are there more visual hallucinations in my future? Per usual, I was told no one really knows about their origins or how to prevent them, except to avoid stress. Okay, no more stress for me then!

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I wish I could tell if there is a mystical component here, maybe a 5D upgrade perhaps? Or is it simply another manifestation of an aging body and a stressful life? Or is it both? Or neither? I wish I had a clue. I really do.

Please share in the comments if you have had a similar eye event.

An inquiring mind ( mine) wants to know.

Some may find it exciting, but my hold on reality does not need this type of excitement. I was never a fan of disco and grew up during the Disco Sucks movement. Maybe I feel this way because of some of the songs played on a continuous loop during my formative years.

Like this one:

images courtesy of wikipedia.org, public domain

Tree House Refuge

I knew upon seeing this sign that it would be prominently placed in a future post. We are always one, whether we like it or acknowledge it. It just is. This entry is a follow up to my post in February about the treasures unleashed at a recent consult with my Spiritual Director. It took me a few months but I finally made it over to Morris Arboretum to revisit their TreeHouse exhibit. I picked a day that turned out to be warmer than expected and the place was packed with families and their young children. As an introvert, my pursuit of peace was not found during this trip. Yet, the TreeHouse was lovely and the Rose Garden was in full bloom. And then I discovered the Garden Railway was back “on track.” Sorry, I had to go there!

While this excursion ( only about 10 minutes from home) was neither mystical or freeing, the photos I took are lovely and the signage about Interconnection was not lost on me. Here are a few shots from the Arboretum:

The sky was so vibrantly blue and I had seen so much of the place with fresh eyes. But it was almost closing time and I was feeling oddly dehydrated so my exploration was put on hold for another time.

You see, the day before my visit was very intensely emotional for me and I felt quite depleted.  Sadly, the  ” Treehouse refuge ” I was seeking still remains elusive. I still have much to process as my recent homecoming was certainly not idyllic. I am in no hurry though. I have learned not to rush the process. My spirit does feel some comfort though from my snapshots of nature on this ordinary Spring afternoon. I hope you find them comforting as well.

 

A House is Not a Home

Thanks to the magic of Google maps, I do not have to take a new image to show my childhood home. I lived here from the end of 6th grade through junior year of college. The house was white with light blue trim originally but my parents decided on a chocolate brown upgrade.

I recently learned that my mother sold our house to move into an older adult apartment community, aka retirement place where people go to die community. I know this is strong language, but I am speaking my truth. She has wanted to sell even before my dad died, over 10 years ago. I do not know if I will get the chance to see it in-person one last time before she vacates.

Here’s the thing: I spent most of my childhood in various apartments in four states from birth to age 11. I had 4 homes from 2nd through 6th grade, including going to two different schools in separate states for both 5th and 6th grades. We finally “settled down ” when I was 11 as my parents purchased this modest home in a predominantly affluent housing development. It is the only house I ever lived in, with a yard and separation from neighbors. This meant privacy and less noise ( outside of my family dramas). Why my parents could not wait for the summer to move says way more about how I was parented then anything else. My moon in Gemini in the fourth house would speak to the frequent disruptions, but damn, my dad was not in the military!

This ordinary suburban split level structure was filled with drama, kind of like Game of Thrones, but without the dragons or intriguing character arcs. It contained plenty of power plays, betrayals, and arguments. I would not call it a happy home. But a house is not a home.

I have not as of yet lived in a house as an adult. My homes have all been apartments. While my current home is fine, it is small and a bit crowded with stuff because of insufficient storage space. Maybe this is partly why I am having some difficulty letting my old house go. This is a place, mind you, that I rarely visited once I moved away. I could not wait to get out of there and told myself I would not return. My sister did live there a few years after college, but I did not.

The therapist part of me knows that I still want to ” reclaim my childhood” before letting go of the house. I have done as much inner work as I can on this. When I consider the fond memories, they are overshadowed by darkness, with one exception.

That would be the music.

My mom plays piano well and this gift was passed down from her father who learned by ear. I don’t know how he was exposed to the piano, but he did play in the silent movie theaters, so I am told. The house was warm with emotion when my mom sang and played on many an evening. She lit up completely while playing. I believe she was born to play. She says the piano is going with her to the new place.

Google maps has made it possible for me to move on even if I cannot find time for a visit before the place is packed up or occupied by the new residents. I hope they make it a house filled with love. When or if they have children ( it is a young couple), I pray they figure out how to parent them well, or well enough. Maybe then they won’t all grow up to be therapists and heal others as a way to address their unhealed parts.

I am afraid this post is coming off rather bitter, but this is not my intention. I am still figuring out why I am bothered so much by this event. I can understand why my mother wants to live among people her age and have activities and transportation at her disposal. All I know is that I feel sad and a bit confused.

I am well aware that home is inside me, at the seat of my soul. A house is a structure made up of matter, which is not solid. I don’t remember my family being that messed up until we moved in. Perhaps it had to do with my parents’ entrance into middle age and the state of the marriage. I don’t know.

What I do know is that I will continue living life the best I know how, with faith that I can find joy and peace within. And some sweet music wouldn’t hurt either.