Guilt comes up

This post from Karin is so necessary and spoke to me at a profound level. I am reblogging this one because it ties together so many important themes: separation, residual feelings about separation, feeling the feelings which leads to dismantling collective density and more….

Spiritual Awakening

End of August and beginning of September 2013, around the time when I was treated by the spiritual healer, I hit the guilt layer full force.

According to A Course in Miracles which I had read a couple of years ago, there was first the thought of separation, and that created the thought of guilt. Which in turn created fear.  Which in turn created the universe which features the illusion of separateness of things in time and space. (That’s the root-cause analysis of the human condition in a nutshell according to ACIM and The Disappearance of the Universe by Gary Renard).

In Gary Renard’s book, it was explained that the underlying guilt is unconscious. When I read that, I thought, ‘Guilt? What guilt? I feel like the most innocent person on the planet. After all, I am always making sure that I keep my promises and that I don’t…

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Can’t We All Get Along?

Can’t we all get along? This is a famous quote spoken by Rodney King whose brutal attack by police in 1992 sparked the Los Angeles Riots. Sometimes it seems little has changed, but I know better. As the Equinox approaches with the Sun entering Libra, thoughts of equality, justice, civility, relationship and harmony all weigh heavily on my heart.

There is light at the end of the pier, tunnel, and within all hearts. I consider myself a passionate person who has tempered some of this energy as I have matured. Yet my passion has been quite stirred on social media lately when it comes to the division around politics, COVID-19, belief systems, and the push to “take a side.” I have had to be more cautious on Facebook and even here on my beloved WP. I have lost some readers and followers because of my opinions. Have any of you experienced this too?

I work so hard to not react, or better yet, react with kindness and compassion. My opinions and beliefs continue to evolve and I think this is a good thing. What bothers me the most is the cruelty displayed online, especially by those who call themselves spiritual. So many of these beliefs and actions have a high stakes quality because decisions made can cost human life and affect the planet in so many negative ways. Life was so much simpler when I was a teenager or young adult and was so sure I knew everything, so full of myself, ha!

Athena

I hate having to worry about censoring myself around people I consider to be my friends. Sometimes I just avoid a post, Meme or comment and simply move on. I am not that interested in convincing anyone to take my side. I just feel such sadness about how many lives have been lost or hurt due to this cancerous division that has taken over our universe. Some choices are deadly and the intensity keps amping up.

As always, I look for guidance, usually within , through mindfulness, meditation, writing, walking and now- by practicing Reiki on myself and my environment. I know I cannot be hurt by anyone and that no-thing is truly personal. But it still can sting. So I am sharing another Lorie Ladd video that I found helpful.

While I do not adhere to all of Lorie’s belief systems, I know her heart. She is gentle, sincere, and real. She also does her best to welcome diversity of ideas within her community. This video explains her current take on the energies as guided by and through the Galactic Federation of Light. It is so interesting that I find so much diversity within the Spiritual community; never before have I witnessed such division and negativity. Let me know how you see this phenomenon in the comments. Can we agree to disagree without “cancelling each other” ?  I hope so.

Who Are You? Part I

I wanted to post something today on the 19th anniversary of 9/11. I was born in New York City, currently live in Pennsylvania and have visited the DC area many times and have relatives who live not far from that region.

While I am more inclined now to think the whole event was an “inside job”,  it does not lessen all the hate and trauma nurtured from then until now. Including all the carnage due to war and acts of violence arising from all this density. While it is human to struggle with difference and assign blame, we are all sparks of the divine. May we all see this truth sooner, rather than later.

litebeing chronicles

Who Are You ? by the Who

This is the first installment of a series on identity. I would imagine that most people shift in identity many times within a lifespan. As my spiritual evolution continues to accelerate, my identity is dissolving once again. Yet, if I choose to live on Earth in a body, it is crucial that I remain tethered to some ego structures , aka personality.

Let’s focus today on race and ethnicity. As someone who was raised with two religious orientations always lurking in the background, I found myself quite confused. My mom grew up Roman Catholic and went to church regularly, yet she says she did not like this faith and happily went along with Judaism when she married my dad. She learned some Hebrew and became familiar with many of the customs and joined Jewish organizations.  She did not have to convert because her…

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How Open is Your Mind? Freedom and Free Will

UPDATE : Imagine my surprise to hear Obama’s historic speech  warning  about the possible end of the US democracy live from Phila’s Museum of the American Revolution. Was it  really just back in March when I visited this sacred space during my short staycation?

This post is the sequel to my last post about free thinking and reprogramming the mind. This blog is not primarily political in nature but I do speak up when I have an opinion that connects with the evolution of our planet. I have a few opinions I want to share today. Let me preface this to say my goal is not changing anyone’s belief systems, but rather to share my truth at this time.

First, here’s a little background: While I grew up in a family with constant bickering, my parents actually did agree for the most part about politics. While my mom would never disclose who she voted for, I knew she and my father were liberal Democrats and never wavered. My father would say many people became Republican once they became affluent, but since that did not happen for us, no worries! I do not believe my political views were passed onto me by my parents. We agreed on very few things and my lifestyle is incredibly different from what was “expected of me. ” It is simply a surprise that my general political values did not stray far from the generation before me. However, my ideas continue to move further and further away from Democratic capitalism because I have come to see how our system in the US is slavery, thinly covered up with a veil of participatory representation. There are elections in autocratic governments around the world,  but simply window dressing. I hope the New Earth we co create will make it possible for all people to live out their potential without the burden of working in jobs they hate in order to support the Military Industrial Complex and the players behind the scenes.

I was strongly encouraged to vote and my 18th birthday was the day before Election day so that next day my parents took me to the polling place. They did not tell me who to vote for but wanted to celebrate this rite of passage. Later in life my parents became poll workers. I do not take this right for granted and it came late to women (this is the 1oo year anniversary of the Suffrage movement although many women of color did not get to participate until much much later) in the US.  I was deeply affected by Watergate and watched Nixon resign on television with my family while on vacation. I did watch some of the hearings while much of it was over my head. I had no illusions about corruption and power at a young age. I also paid attention to how I felt when I heard someone speak. I wanted to feel inspired but at the same time, I was no fool. I am still no fool and can read people like a book, my Scorpio super power 🙂

The interview with Tom Montalk was amazing and so chock full of information. Some of the premises I had heard before but his grasp of the concepts helped me integrate them with ease. I was not happy though to hear again this emphasis on the Left and Socialism being bad and part of the NWO. The soundbite is: Small Government = Good, Big Government = Bad. I am  stating a oversimplification here, but many of the “woke” notions are way too simple.

I learned in school that the US was built on manifest destiny and rugged individualism but this morphed into an exploitation of the original Tea Party and Trickle Down economics. I remember all my student grants being taken away when Reagan assumed office and college became less affordable. And I knew there was more of this change to come. What I did not know was that this timeline was the beginning of the erosion of middle class America.

Democracy’s de jure status in the world as of 2020; only Saudi Arabia, Oman, the UAE, Qatar, Brunei, and the Vatican officially admit to be undemocratic

 

The online world is hyped with this notion of freedom, patriotism, and sovereignty. All sounds great, right?  Yes, and this matrix we live in is mostly a fatalistic determined system. Watch Westworld  and you will see what I mean.   I am told by many that we choose our incarnation between lifetimes and yet there is no real time in the higher dimensions , but I digress…

My astrology knowledge leads me to conclude that a large percentage of our trajectory is decided for us, but that some free will is tolerated. Free will is typically exercised in reaction to pre-determined life events.  We can go off script and many of us will continue to do so, at least part of the time. I am a lover of the ideal of freedom and not conventional.  Yet I do not think one can be totally free in a 3D body in 2020.

But I go back again and again to what resonates for me. How do I feel when I watch a video or read an email or talk to someone face to face? What feels off and what feels good to me? These self inquiries are very important. I do not think Socialism is a dirty word and I also think  that the far left and far right eventually end up at the same place, fascism and loss of agency. If Trump wins or refuses to leave, I am afraid my people will be sent back to the camps and elections will continue ” Putin  and Castro style. ” I do not care if people agree with me or not, but he is effing out of his mind! How can I ignore my training as a therapist and ignore the obvious?

I do like the idea of basic protections for every human and will not apologize for it. I do not like so much of my tax money going to the military. I never understood the point of war and my leanings have not shifted. I rather more of my money be spent on education, health care, and protecting the environment. I welcome basic universal income but I do not think that translates into people not working. Having a purpose is part of the package and most people want to be productive.  Most of human existence has been built on the backs of slaves, indentured servants, and the impoverished. It took me a little while to grasp how unfair it is that most humans have to spend most of their time working at jobs they hate just to feed their families and have a place to live. I thought that this was just how the world works. I figured it out eventually and began to see that we can create so much more if survival was a given, not a daily challenge.  Most of us are still very much enslaved but are no longer labeled as such.

Democratic Socialism is a form of representative government where people have a say in shaping society and also have governmental support. As someone who has spent a few years off and on with a lack of secure employment, I know there is a better way. I would say that FDR is among my favorite leaders.  I did a paper on the Depression in junior or senior high and learned about all the public works programs he initiated. ( I also wrote a paper on Watergate right after it was complete). Perhaps I was destined to study Social Work and formally become a Social Worker. I knew rather early on how I wanted to make the world a better place ( lightworker memories maybe?)

Athena ~ The goddess symbolizing freedom and democracy.

I am well aware there are elites in both political parties and that so so many of our “leaders” are puppets. Yet, there are some who cannot be swayed or bought and have moral integrity. I want to live in a world without homeless people, without uncontrolled addiction and mental illness, without school shootings, without racial and gender inequality. What many countries have right now is government surveillance, dependence on big tech and the uber billionaire class, and very little autonomy. I do not see why the “woke ” are not interested in helping the ill get free healthcare and the financially strapped get low cost access to higher education. Debt equals servitude and I know this all too well. I am not advocating a planetary government and think that would be a disaster. If greed was off the table, many more nations would be able to choose their own form of self governance. But greed is currently very much alive.

I hope this piece at the very least makes a case for softening the polarity between  red and blue philosophy. I do not like getting government income but would be on the streets right now without it.  I worked for City Government for close to 20 years and saw first hand how corrupt and manipulative it can be. Yet I enjoyed union protections and enjoyed generous raises and excellent medical benefits and vacation time. I  also was gifted great opportunities while working there to assist fractured families and  improve the quality of many  excellent fully or partially – funded governmental programs like MANNA. I also was given the chance to go to school full time to obtain my MSS degree ( practically tuition – free)  while working part time and still receive my entire salary and benefits. Like so many situations. with the bitter lies the sweet.

I know I am lucky to not have been born in Russia or some of the other places where my ancestors came from. As a Jew, I am a descendant of slaves and that data is encoded in my DNA. In fact, many thought leaders say all of humanity was manipulated numerous times by off – planet beings. This could very well be true, especially since we use so little of our brain capacity and regain so much of our violent tendencies. Most of us are enslaved in one form or another. Writing this article is one way I can become unshackled. I do not want to be boxed in. I am a lightworker and I do not think Trump is a savior. We must save ourselves! I wish this was not the case but I am afraid our rights will be further eroded if we do not get rid of this evil regime. My heart goes out to our brothers and sisters in Belarus who are actively fighting to dismantle their country’s  police state. Trump wants the US to have the same set up by derailing our rights to vote through dismantling the USPS.  I am not endorsing the Democratic alternative but I prefer vanilla to what we have now. Critical thinking means being willing to be unpopular in order to be cool with your soul. I am more than willing to do this. The answers will become clearer when people begin making assessments with their inner resonance. Tolerating difference is also essential, now more than ever. I guess my bottom line is that we must find a way to listen to each other and still retain our personal truths and unique energetic signatures.

 

Wishing you a lovely Sunday and peaceful week ahead.

 

 

All images either property of litebeing chronicles © or wikpedia.org public domain

Digging Deep

This world keeps turning and I keep changing from the inside out. With plenty of time for soul searching, it occurred to me that I learned about disruption and reset very early and could be an expert in instability and impermanence. I would not recommend early childhood and adolescent trauma but I am grateful it did not morph into PTSD.   But it might account for this why I tire so quickly of tasks and routines and yet sometimes crave tasks and routines? Ambivalence I have learned to befriend and it is a worthwhile alliance.

After much delay and indecision I finally exchanged my company laptop and keys for my personal belongings from work. At some point I realized that I did not want to return to my old office. I rather just get my stuff and be done with it. So I asked my manager if he would be willing to pick up 3 items for me and make the exchange in our neighborhood. He surprisingly agreed without hesitation. I had already written him an unsent letter, clearing out any crap between us. This is known in ascension speak as alchemizing the density into light. I would be lying if I said this was easy, but I am a therapist and I know how to do this.

Here was our conversation :

Me: Hi

Him : Hi, put this down here  pointing to the bench

Me : The keys are in the bag with the laptop

Him: I found something in the desk that might be yours so I brought it.

Me : What?

Him: Lotion

Me:  I looked in the bag and all 3 items were there plus lavender vanilla cream, which was mine but I had deemed non-essential.         Yes this is mine.  D0 you have the gift card?

Him: Oh, I forgot. It is in my work bag.

Me : I just silently stared at his masked face with my own masked face.

Him: We could meet again?

Me : Thinking to myself ” Fuck no. ” Silence

Him: I could give you cash?

Me: Okay

Him:  He hands me a 10 dollar bill.  It was a starbucks gift card.

Me: So now you can keep it for yourself. It isn’t about the money. It is about the principle.

Him : Take care

Me:  I walk away.

 

It was all very civilized. He had awarded me a gift card at a staff meeting and never gave it to me. It was for five dollars so I made a profit, lol! Yes I took his money without any thought. He took my job away , laying me off because he could. It was like an awkward breakup when people come back to retrieve stuff left behind. I have been through this a time or two.

Just a few days later I saw that my former employer was advertising for my old job. This stung but I got over it rather quickly. I would never work for this company again with these current people at the helm. Another day or so later I “inadvertently” came upon an ad for an incredible job opportunity at an Ivy League University doing clinical work for a research project. This ” happy accident” occurred because I saw a job website email and wondered if my old job was listed. It wasn’t, but this very rare opportunity was listed. I felt inspired. I went outside and I saw a fat gold and white cat approach me, followed by a monarch butterfly and then a small cabbage white butterfly. The energy was shifting…..

The dance with darkness in most sectors of my life is determined by my natal chart. Pluto in the 7th  is an aspect that I have become adept at navigating ( it is not near the Asc/Desc axis fortunately but it is conjunct my north node, summoning me to grow through major  interpersonal excavations). What is much more treacherous for me is Pluto making a rather close square to my MC/IC axis, meaning my inner world, family, home, grounding and my vocation, professional life, reputation, work family ( not to mention both parental figures) are besieged by challenges of power struggles, manipulation, destruction, and reinvention. Good times? no! Clearly I ordered a complex life path from the All You Can Eat Cosmic buffet menu for this lifetime.

So when motivated , I dig deep and work on being my better self, remembering I am not here to hold onto blame, regrets, and old grievances. I know that to attract and acquire a safe healthy workplace with generally decent people I must embody all those qualities in myself and let go of all that does not match that vibration. We are all so much more than we “think” we are and even when we are not living small, there is still larger ways of being. I am not aiming for perfection as that is a trap. I am seeking balance, grace, and humility. And also a butterfly, a fat cat and miracles wherever they pop up.

all indigenous images courtesy of wikipedia.org
wikipedia.org public domain

The Golden Road to Transformation

Where were you 25 years ago today? RIP Jerry ❤

 

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What a long strange trip it’s been, indeed.

My inspiration for the Time Machine Challenge started on a crisp and brilliant afternoon in September. If you are new to my blog or would like to catch up on your reading, please visit here to find the entire roster of spectacular challenge blogs. Reminiscing about my first September in Philly and the man who represented that era took me back to a state of excitement and joy.  I was amazed how my instantaneous flash of insight was later validated when I visited a website where that former boyfriend currently works. According to Michael Lutin, this time period before the New Scorpio Moon accentuates preoccupation and/or random encounters with past lovers or folks who trigger memories of former flames.

A few connections from Leigh and Laura gently guided me on a path of forgiveness and acceptance of the past. Leigh’s post on the  ho’oponopono prayer got me thinking of all the guilt and regret that still remains within me. An unexpected email from a stranger set in motion a fresh attempt to reframe any past relationships. I am speaking of the ones that seemed to stick with me, defying all my efforts to sever lingering cords. That stranger who contacted me is now a friend who readers know as Laura.

So I set out on an adventure to forgive all my past romantic entanglements, beginning with the first and moving towards present time. I would recite ho’oponono before falling asleep and visualize myself back in time with these former flames. It was often unpleasant as long forgotten details resurfaced. I was also looking to explore with fresh eyes the circumstances in which my ex from college would re-enter my life. I am seeking clues as to what his presence symbolizes for me now. I expected this process would eventually lead to healing. Truth be told, this exercise has been met with much resistance. However, I still am pursuing this path, hoping it is a “path with heart.”

But it is a path unfinished and did not reveal a story for the challenge. Around the same time ( late September) I followed up by contacting the director of the group practice where my ex works to inquire about employment. I did so because my ex works at their other location and my friend spoke so highly of the director. This contact led me to the discovery that I cannot get re-credentialed at my level of licensure. Perhaps this was a blessing in disguise because if I was hired and unable to work, the fallout would have been more upsetting and more time would have been wasted.

So I put off writing a post and hoped for the best. After reading Fiona’s challenge offering, I remembered an unfinished draft from July. Oddly enough, it addresses the challenge beautifully. Why am I surprised to discover that yet again Spirit has other plans?

So without further adieu I bring you my nonlinear, unplanned, but totally cool trip back in time:

See that girl, barefootin’ along,
Whistlin’ and singin’, she’s a carryin’ on.
There’s laughing in her eyes, dancing in her feet,
She’s a neon-light diamond and she can live on the street.

Hey hey, hey, come right away
Come and join the party every day.

Well everybody’s dancin’ in a ring around the sun
Nobody’s finished, we ain’t even begun.
So take off your shoes, child, and take off your hat.
Try on your wings and find our where it’s at. *

Was it 2015 or 1978 or perhaps 1967 ?  You decide:

July 4, 2015:

I had just received some long over -due money. I noticed that the Grateful Dead were live streaming their Chicago Fare Thee Well  50 year anniversary reunion concerts on On Demand. The fees were pricey but I had extra money. I deserved to splurge on something fun and purely entertaining. I had not seen any assembly of the Dead in decades and I was not going to be teleported to Chicago, sans an airplane ticket and place to stay. The concerts were to be held over 3 nights. This could be my last chance to see them perform, ever. Which night do I choose?

I could not justify viewing all 3 shows. I finally decided that July 4th would be the one. My reasoning was they would be settled in after the 1st show and since I associate the Dead with parties, why not celebrate America’s birthday in style? This decision was an arduous process. As an INFJ, I like to ponder and deliberate, often to a fault. In this case, I am glad I took my time.

Earlier that day I spotted a HUGE beetle like creature on my bedroom door. It seemed almost alien-like. I was terrified but managed to flush it down the toilet. Dexter was oblivious to this terrifying menace, but it certainly got a reaction out of me. I looked up beetle online to see what I could find here.

By J. Coelho [CC BY 2.0 (http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/2.0)], via Wikimedia Commons

This image is a rather close approximation. While I found the various interpretations fascinating, the following paragraph holds true till the present:

Perhaps the most profound lesson the beetle shares with us is the lesson of transformation and adaptation. Beetles engage in metamorphosis for development and growth. From egg to adult, they are a marvel of transformation illustrated in a short lifetime. They go through these revolutionary transformations with aplomb, very nonchalantly and matter-of-factly. Beetles embrace the flow of life and all its transitions without question. They surrender to change.

Looking back, I realize that this was my final complete weekend with Dexter. I was blissfully unaware that he would be leaving me so soon. Yet I did surrender to change and enter into a phase of transformation. The beetle sighting was fortuitous as it signals a new way of being on the planet. I would venture a guess that Dexter is more adaptive than I have been, given his loving demeanor in spite of multiple placements and tricky health issues.  We have so much to gain from the natural world.

Post beetle episode, I am ready for the concert. There was so much to take in and integrate.  Never in my wildest dreams would I have imagined watching a live concert on TV in this fashion. The word surreal is not superfluous in this instance. The telecast was filmed so you were truly in the moment, without commercials and artificial editing. I cannot exactly describe it, but it was quite close to being there in Chicago.

It turns out I almost lived in Chicago. My parents traveled their often as it was where my dad’s company’s main headquarters were located. It is also where they purchased my very first astrology book. I still have it and it was published in the 1960s. I also made a wonderful friend from Chicago who I met in Miami. We both stayed at the same hotel for 2 years over Xmas holidays. We became pen pals and I never forgotten her. Plus I have some online blogger buddies from Chicago so the city keeps appearing in my life.  I recently found out that we almost moved there when I was young. My mother revealed that my dad was offered a big promotion at the main headquarters. I was shocked to hear that he turned it down, given we moved around so often.  So here I am focusing in on elusive and mysterious Chicago. Here’s yet another example of the road not traveled.

wikipedia.org public domain

The music itself was very moving. The pace was slow and many of the songs were folksy and bluegrass style. The evening progressed like a heartfelt lullaby. Yet at certain points the mood shifted and the pace quickened. I had not been feeling well and was functioning on little energy. But I was propelled to get off my couch and dance. One song in particular set me in motion like a dervish. The Golden Road to Unlimited Devotion was playing. I could have been hallucinating , but I was lucid and sober. As Dexter watched, I began to swirl. This is MY song and I have never heard it performed live. I felt as if another force was propelling me into seamless, graceful, dizzying, flight. How did I get so energized? What was the source of all this power inside of me? I was floating on air, whizzing in circles, free of obstructions or constraints. I was on fire!

Later I researched the show online to read about the setlist. I came upon this article that blew my mind wide open. Here is what was written about the Golden Road performance:

Next up was “The Golden Road (To Unlimited Devotion),” a song Jerry Garcia wrote about the Haight hippie scene that The Grateful Dead only played a handful of times in 1967. Bruce Hornsby and Trey Anastasio fronted the group on the obscurity.

My favorite ( among favorites such as Eyes of the World, Sugar Magnolia, Truckin’, Scarlet Begonias, US Blues, and Box of Rain, to name a few) is basically a favorite of the few. It was last performed in 1967. I had not even heard of the band until 1977 and had not attended my first show until 1978.  It is probably a statistical anomaly that this song was performed on the exact night I decided to watch the show. This is not just a song to me. It is an anthem. I was this chick in the song in high school and college. Or at least I imagined myself to be like her. She was free and blissful and at peace. Perhaps I longed to get out of my own way so I could be her.

I actually transformed into her a few months earlier. Here is an excerpt of my May 26th post on dream number 3 of an incredibly active sojourn of slumber.

May 26, 2015 ( circa 1978?)

And now for something completely different:

3 – Went back in time to the 1970s. Lots of teens around, big crowd. I run into a friend.We will call him “Sam.” He used to be my dream prompt. Seeing him meant I was dreaming. He has not appeared in years though. There was to be a 1970s party. I was excited about this. My friend “Sam” said I would like to dance with you , big smile. I was so excited and I typically don’t like to dance. Lots of love between me and Sam, unlike real life where we were longtime yet intermittent, platonic friends. I knew him from when I first moved to NJ in the middle of 6th grade through the summer after HS grad when our families vacationed at the same hotel down the shore. At the party, there was such a joyous atmosphere. The room was dark and the music was psychedelic. Sam and I hit the dance floor and did our thing. We were both young but I danced with the confidence of a more mature person. In high school I would have not felt as eager to express myself this freely.

When I turned around I saw a young Bob Weir singing Grateful Dead music. It was a big surprise. I have dreamed of Bob and Jerry( Garcia) many times before over the years. Sometimes while dreaming I talk with them. In this dream I did not know Bob, nor did I interact with him. I was so excited and remembered Sam was there at my first Grateful Dead concert in 1978. The same day he and his band performed a concert at the high school. A group of us began to chant the date of that concert 5-13-78. ( later I checked and that was the actual date of the concert. How did I remember that?) It was wild. I said to him “You were in a band!” I think he was the lead singer. My friends who attended the concert with me were at this party or at the very least I mentioned them to Sam. Some of Sam’s friends were also there. Sam and I were becoming a couple and were very happy. I felt loved and adored.

What was so interesting was the Bob Weir became the face of the Dead once Jerry Garcia passed away. He was my favorite anyway so I would always focus on Bobby. I was also stunned to realize the prophetic nature of this dream. I was seeing Bob Weir perform and dancing as if no one was watching. I was imbuing my current knowingness into the past.  What a wild ride of past and future morphing together in Dreamtime. You could say that for a few short minutes I was livin’ the dream.

I said Fare Thee Well to Dexter one week later. I also learned that the farewell concerts were not the last. A newly formed group called Dead and Company featuring Bob Weir, John Mayer ( another Libra with loads of Scorpio) , Mickey Hart, and others have begun touring recently so the music apparently never stops in some form.

Update: Apparently Dead and Company were performing in Philadelphia last night ( 11-5-15) while I was completing this post. The synchronicity continues…

We never know how much or how little is happening at any given time. I did not know that my current physical body possessed that much energy. I certainly never expected to hear the Golden Road performed live and in real-time in my living room. Life is a mystery that keeps surprising me, just when I think I’ve got it all figured out.

But I have figured out one important lesson. I want to play! Perhaps having the experience of both spontaneity, exuberance, and confidence will assist me in replicating this behavior going forward. My birthday is approaching as I type and I have set my intention to be that girl from the Golden Road. Being free and playful and in motion is the way. 

The time machine kept me quite busy, transporting me to and from Philly to Chicago and to 1967 ( around the year I began studying astrology), 1978,  2015 and beyond. My consciousness flowed from waking state to frenzied ecstasy to Dreamtime. My challenge was not what I intended upon its inception in September. Yet I took the steps necessary to get me to this point. Now I am ready to try on my wings.

*lyrics credit

Here’s a video of the original 67 performance.

Here’s what I saw on 7-4-15.

Thanks to all for another spectacular blogging challenge. They keep getting better because WE keep getting better.

image credits: beetle by J. Coelho [CC BY 2.0 (http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/2.0)], via Wikimedia Commons dervishes images, wikipedia.org, public domain
header image, wikipedia.org, public domain
wikiart.org public domain

Brave New Earth

http://commons.wikimedia.org/

Sometimes I see unfathomable beauty while dreaming. Other times I capture it digitally on my phone. I used to see it often while visiting museums or going to places like Longwood Gardens. And occasionally, I find it on TV or film. The city depicted in the new TV series Brave New World was unfathomably beautiful until it wasn’t.

When the new Peacock streaming platform announced the launching of Brave New World, I was more than excited, I was held in a state of anticipation. I was held for a few months until it aired on July 15th. Based on the 1931 novel by Aldous Huxley  ( during a Saturn Pluto opposition), the story asks what happens when an outsider is brought into a contained technologically – controlled society that stresses conformity, frowns on monogamy, forbids procreation, and manages emotional fluctuation with designer drugs.

I must admit I rather liked the idea of living in the utopian New London during the first couple of episodes. Everyone seemed happy and happiness is highly valued. No one got ill, everyone had a job they loved, and every night was a party. I quickly realized I would only be happy if I was designated an Alpha or a Beta. This concept reminds me of my high school, where each student was assigned an academic track. Maybe this arrangement started earlier, but I don’t think I was aware until entering high school. I was in the A track, meaning I took the most difficult classes with the smartest students. Maybe this was decided by test scores, it was never explained or discussed with me. I did belong there, mostly. I performed miserably in Biology, and was relegated to B track for Science classes going forward. I enjoyed meeting new friends in B Chemistry and actually learned more there. However, I cannot see myself being happy as someone considered “average” or less than. I was raised to be studious and intelligence was how I was recognized.  It was “my thing”, said my ego. With higher ranking there is more privilege in New London, but freedom does not exist.  Embryos are designed to be different as each subtype is needed for the greater functioning of the whole. We naturally have diversity within our species, but we lack equality and basic living standards in this “modern” world of 2020 AD. To say this is problematic is to state the obvious.

wikiart.org pub domain

Upon completion of Season 1, I was eager to reread the novel. Fairly certain I had a copy at home, I found one hidden away with some other Sci-Fi classics such as 1984 and Walden 2. While perusing the forward of the 1946 edition, the author concludes that world totalitarianism is imminent, it is just a matter of when and in what form. The story was set in the 2500s. However, Huxley reveals that this was inaccurate and that a fascist state is most likely to happen in the early 21st century.

And here we are….

Images courtesy of wikiart.org and wikipedia.com, public domain

Being Here

Hi litebeings, as we edge closer to Mercury stationing direct, I am aware of a promise I made to myself and my readers. I promised to complete and publish a post sitting in storage. Most of these are more ideas than copy, but they set the stage for article creation.

I am still working on a post about my trip to Baltimore. It is not ready yet but I hope to have it done before Sunday morning when Mercury does its thing. Can I use 2 power outages in one week as an excuse for not delivering sooner? Probably not.

I am not judging, just nudging! I realize that I prefer to be more gentle with myself and recognize that my time is rarely in synch with my Higher Self’s timeline. Stuff happens and my job as a sentient being is to relax into life with acceptance and ease. I spent some time during the power outage drawing a mandala and enjoyed my ability to focus. I also enjoyed these surprise visitors to my neck of the woods.

It is not easy to see but there are two deer, easily camouflaged by nature’s cover. My daily living is like this, with guidance speeding up, but remaining quite subtle. I am writing this today mostly to say I am working with the current energies, appreciating that I thrive as I truly allow myself to let go of wants and needs and listen to that still small voice. Meditation is growing on me and I can once again understand why so many sing its praises. Being one with the breath while inhabiting the body is a privilege.

While it can be fun to have less restrictions and a myriad of choices, I am working with what is presented. There is still free will to be had. That’s a topic for another time. Yet, I will share with you a quote from the show Westworld that I really like:

 Free will does exist. It’s just fuckin’ hard!

I think it is a good time to throw in some questions for you my lovely readers:

What have you learned about your ” self ” lately?

Are you embracing simplicity?

What are you reading?

How are you playing?

 

PS: I did not save my work again and it was not pretty so listen to my advice especially while Mercury is wonky.

My heart sings when I receive a donation for my blog. It lets me know you see me, in this time of wobbly reality and no financial certainty.

Namaste

 

Litebeing’s Energy Update

What if it is really all okay ” underneath it all “, whether we enjoy, judge, understand, integrate, or resist the experience?  About 30 years ago, a young man I was very smitten with, took me to one of his favorite bars. It was an awkward evening and my time with him proved to manifest plenty of awkward moments ahead. In any case, I found him to be wise and confident and took him waaay too seriously. But he said something in the bar in Upper Darby that still rings true now ( and oddly enough,  I still remember it!) He simply told me, “life is here to experience. ” That sentence seemed a bit radical to me then, but not unpalatable or easily rejectable. We did not use words phrases like 3rd density or clear our fields but we were part of a  group of friends who studied The Course and other spiritual teachings. I was down with his concept as long as I liked the experience. It is not designed that way.

I did not plan to write about that meeting in the bar. A lot more was said that evening, but that’s not fit for blogging! This story is included because I am working on relying more on my gut and intuition, using my intellect more as “backup. ”

This is my energy update and the forecast is stormy and humid with a chance of magick.

On previous layoffs, I have struggled with how to best spend my time. Often I was required to apply to jobs weekly as a condition to receive unemployment. This go-round there is no job search requirement. I look inside myself daily to determine what is meaningful, fun, and perhaps healing and/or geared towards awakening? I realize that this timeline we are in is so unusual and I want to use it well or have Source use me well. I hit a recent snag right after the Mercury station when my former manager asked me to come back to the office and hand in my keys and laptop. I became acutely aware of how much resentment I have accumulated towards him. This stems mostly from my disappointment that he was not the person I imagined him to be. This pattern often shows up when I compose a narrative around someone I hardly know and it turns out to be incorrect.  I wanted him to be the creative, thoughtful, reflective person that I saw initially. He ended up treating me poorly and displayed anger, deceptive maneuvers, and condescension. I see my disappointment causing a strong aversion to meeting with him again. I do realize that my actions have also colored his interactions with me, but it still stings. I am considering writing a letter to him as a way to release my emotional baggage. This is a therapy technique I have used often in my work so I figure it can assist me in letting go of the past and accepting him and each moment as it is.

Almost 4 months into lockdown, my body has been suffering for most of it. Today I can report the “cold ” is improving, my toe hurts less, my skin inflammations are almost gone and my GI tract is rebounding from whatever happened yesterday. I wonder if I welcome illness to avoid responsibility or simply become unwell as my body works to rid itself of all the low frequency thought and experiences I take in? The answer could be neither or both, I do not know.

In any case, I am pleased to say this quarantine has not been just one extended sick day. I have noticed more lightness and laughter and have become more grateful for what I have and the people that I love.

I am also grateful that hydrangea grow outside my bedroom every other year. There is some regularly scheduled beauty in my world. Lovely hydrangea, there is a reason I choose you as my gravatar image.

Synchronicity Central ~ Friday I was getting breakfast at Dunkin and going there reminds me of life pre -COVID. On the way, I noticed a small green grasshopper/ cricket accompanying me on the passenger mirror! He looked just like the one from a couple weeks ago. I turn up the radio and enjoy cruising with this supercool companion! Later in the ride he migrates across the windshield. I did not have a chance to take a photo but he was similar to the cutie I found at the grocery store. While at the drive-through, I  have a worry about catching Covid after the cashier is not wearing a mask and become anxious. After I leave Dunkin I  turn the radio back on.  An instrumental tune entitled Immunity begins playing!  I am thinking ” wow, instant messaging, guide-style, yes!

Many talk about how it is more likely that our physical bodies move back and forth between 3D and 5D. I cannot speak for anyone else, but my ability to tap into Source has increased significantly during social distancing. Telepathy is more frequent and easily confirmed.  The higher vibes usually occur when my mind is quiet and observant. Regular meditation via Headspace is one habit I intend to keep!

The bloom shown above is smiling. You will smile too if you read the announcements below. Please take a peek to get the latest scoop. Let me know how your energy is flowing?

Announcements: 

Save yourself ~ If you are writing online, remember to save your work regularly. WordPress lately has this tendency to highlight and delete all my text. It happened again today while posting here and I did not save my work. I prayed for a solution and somehow autosave must have been operating, despite no indication of it under the Revisions section of the Editor.

Pay it Forward Deadline ~  I am enjoying reading for you and am glad to have a few more “in cue”. If you are still on the fence about getting a reading, decide by July 1, 2020.  Please contact me here to book your free reading. Join the fun! Please contact me also if you want to write a Testimonial about a past or recent reading. The Testimonial page is getting a needed overhaul, waiting for new reviews. Thanks in advance for all the love and support!

Retro works ~ My intention during this Mercury retro season is to publish some posts “vacationing” in the drafts bin. I have been procrastinating writing anything complex and/or lengthy, waiting for my ideas to marinate. I see some of my material to be “timely” so I hope you can support me by encouraging me ( either actively or energetically) to bring this material out in the open.

Namaste dear ones

Refreshed and Rebooted

I did not expect to return here so soon, but here I am with a recommendation. Last night through early morning was another dark period. I developed a headache, congestion and a cough. I went to a sad place with fears of COVID and annihilation. I slept restlessly, plagued with short, dramatic dreams and “visions” of souls on the astral? ( not certain.) I rested a good while in bed, telling myself I can sleep as long as I want. Why do I have this recurring worry that I have something important to do? Nowadays I have less to do than I have in a very long time.

Peace has come upon me once I took my temperature and noticed the cough has not escalated. I wonder if part of the reason I get symptoms so often is because of my empathic abilities. In any case, I feel less anxious and much more grounded. While still “unwell “,  I am not catastrophizing.  Rather, I am sitting with the peace.

Lorie Ladd is my latest go-to YouTube person. A few bloggers have posted about her and one of my offline teachers also follows her. I watched a video about her journey last night and I related to her strongly. I find her to be down to earth, enthusiastic, genuine, and nurturing. I just like her! After watching some of her videos, I noticed my confidence return. I felt like someone actually sees me now, without judgment. Perhaps her heartfelt message contributed to my reboot.

This video is her latest energy update. It is informative, straightforward, and delivered with grace. She is natural and vulnerable and I can tell that she really cares about waking us up. I do not guarantee you will agree with me, nor does that matter. I feel led to share her message and to thank my lovely blogging community.

Thank you all for doing what you do, be it poetry, painting, prose, photography, reblogging, or just speaking your truth in a unique way. We all make a difference and are stronger together. I do not always agree with every idea I read or hear, but I respect the intention to spread consciousness.

Namaste, litebeing