” We are here to serve you.”
Something has shifted. I was not in the hospital anymore. Dorothy had exited Kansas.
My health was pretty crappy and Memorial Day weekend was approaching. I was back, yet again, at my doctor’s office. He suggested I get another CAT scan to see if my infection had returned. He was advised to retest me, despite it not being the regular protocol. I was in so much physical pain and so tired of being tired. I wanted answers, but was not up for another unpleasant test. Drinking the noxious liquid, having dye injected in your veins, being bombarded with radiation. Not my idea of ushering in the unofficial start of Summer.
The plan was to compare the new scan with the old to see if my condition had improved. I scheduled the test and informed my doctor. He called me back to tell me that he rescheduled it for tomorrow. I was furious. How could he go rogue and do this without my consent? Not only that, this was a void of course moon during a Mercury retrograde cycle. I did not like the timing. My doctor thought it was in my best interest to get this done sooner rather than later and assured me the report and scan would be read over the holiday weekend.
I was angry, but because I really like my doctor I complied with his wishes. I figured he really cared about me and saw the need to speed things up. So I drank the yucky liquid and registered at the hospital. This was not a seamless process. I was not seen on time, it took 3 people to find a vein for the dye injection, and so on. I could not wait to get out of there. I was hungry ( you have to go several hours without food) and exhausted. I was worried about the time. It was almost 5:00 PM and the report needed to be processed today. The radiologist needed to get it in the system so my doctor could review it while on call this weekend. The technician was doubtful it would happen, even though my doctor had requested it beforehand. I also needed a copy of my old scan so I was headed for the records department. I arrived about 4:55 PM. I observed several employees exit the door as I approached. I also noticed the chapel across the hall.
I was really worried about seeing my results. What if my condition had not improved? What if I had a tumor? These are the questions that plagued my mind.
The energy was very serene inside and I found that surprising. The other areas of the hospital seemed chaotic and many of the staff appeared either overburdened or oblivious. A man smiled at me and asked how I was doing. I told him about the reports and the deadline. As more people left the office, he remained with me. It was after 5:00 PM on Memorial Day weekend and he did not ask me to leave. He was warm, caring, and very patient. He assured me that the radiologist did read my scan and he would supply me with both reports and CDs. I was taken aback by his kindness. When I sat down with the reports, I burst into tears and began to sob. He witnessed my pain and did not judge me. I thanked him for his kindness.
He said that he was here to serve me. I did not understand. He was different. He did not belong at this hospital. But I was wrong about that. He began to tell me about the hospital being his ministry. I told him he ought to consider being a minister. He told me about how he got ordained later in life. We discussed calling and purpose and how to serve. He told me how he picked up on my anxiety and wanted to help me. We talked about the spiritual path and how challenging it can be. I told him how I did not encounter this kind of care when I was staying in the hospital and that I was struck by the contrast. He then spoke of the link between anxiety and sensitivity. I found this rather interesting. I thanked him profusely, but he did not behave this way as a favor. He saw each individual as worthy. I thanked him anyway and our exchange brought my own desire to serve into clearer focus. At one point I realized that this was a Divine appointment. The circumstances that brought me here were immaterial.
What mattered was that I was deeply connecting with another soul.
When I got home, I looked up the transits and noticed the Sun was square Neptune. Perfect time to meet an angel! I realized that all details were being orchestrated to get me to this point. My tests revealed that my condition was improving, despite my symptoms. This was encouraging news. But I found my holy encounter much more healing. I was truly seen, heard, and cared for. This happened in a setting that seemed very much in alignment with many Western institutions. But it still happened and I was grateful.
This is a holiday tale that took place last spring. Just as relevant now as then. It is about finding angels where you least expect them and when you need them most. Desperately so. It is also about accepting kindness and offering it up to others. While I was working out the details for this draft, the mail arrived. The image above is from a card sent to me by a blogger buddy across the sea. It arrived today. It is an image of an angel. There are no accidents, but we do not always notice. We are only partially awake most of the time. Even litebeings like me are often sleepwalking, especially when under duress. But I have found, time after time, that angels do appear when I need them most. And when I am not looking.
This is the most- requested post, selected by you, my readers. I asked you to choose among several drafts of mine waiting to leave purgatory. Thank you for helping me decide.
This is the season of giving, but what if we served one other every day? What if we served ourselves first and truly loved our inner being? Imagine the possibilities…. Speaking of giving, I am gifting a free reading to my 500th follower and am offering discounts on my services throughout December. To learn more, click on the follow button and visit here.
image credits: wikipedia.org, public domain