Neptune Retrograde ~ End of the Line

Happy Neptune Retrograde! Yes, another re-tread but with an update. I wrote this post about 1 year ago. Fast forward to now and I am also working in addictions, doing groups, with mostly males. I reinstated the Friday music exercise with a few adjustments. The interpretations of this transit remain the same. Go with the flow, slow down, and find your internal GPS.

love to all, litebeing

litebeing chronicles

This has not been an easy time, but when has it ever been easy? While  transiting Jupiter retrograded back on my natal Sun over the past few days, I spent most of the time physically ill and/or exhausted. Astrology is complicated and sometimes transits do not show up in a standard way. The late Donna Cunningham wrote about this topic and postulated that often astrological transits trigger internal events, even when it looks like they ought to be external.

I am not certain, but what I do know is how grateful I feel when the pain subsides or when I am able to just let go and be with the pain. How can we know sweet without bitter, light without dark? In the material world, duality is here to teach us the range of creation. Lately, I have noticed that more nudges have appeared, bringing into focus the complexity of…

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Alleluia, and Good Morning

This blog says so eloquently what I have felt for many years. Blessings on this weekend that celebrates the portal to rebirth and re-newal.

innerwoven

Resurrection.jpgToday is, for many, a day without irony. It is a day one can see not just daylight through cracks in tomb doors, but can look back into what was their tomb from the satisfying light of a new dawn.

These patterns of light and dark, day and night, life and death happen so regularly that they’re almost not worth mentioning. Except, they are.

The ancients call it Paschal Mystery. A repeating pattern of living and dying and renewing that, through the eternal Christ, is everywhere present, everywhere accessible.

Faith is merely the God-given sight necessary to awaken to it. And Easter is the primal, archetypal key that opens that door.

Today is Easter. Resurrection. All that was dark, dead, hopeless, and not, is brought back into glorious harmony with God and the cosmos. Through Christ, today, we feel its warmth. Today, we know its hope.

Today is for all…

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Spring Awakening Part II ~ Embrace Nature’s Splendor

Happy Mercury Retro in Pisces, Pisces New Moon and Uranus entering Taurus (the sequel). This reblog is about spring and here we are on the cusp of spring almost 1 year later!
Reblogs are de riguer during retro cycles so here is one to tide you over until I produce some new posts! This is a huge week so take some deep breaths and enjoy the ride!

litebeing chronicles

Not everyone is made aware of the beginning of a new cycle or season. Although Uranus is my ruling planet, I do not always notice a personal shift when it enters a new sign. This time I did observe a small but important event that announced this major transit. When Uranus first entered Aries, I bought a new cellphone and it had a camera. I used it to take pictures for this blog ( see photo above). A few weeks ago this old phone started buzzing when I turned it on. Sometimes it did not turn on at all. So after seven years I replaced my trusty blue not-so smart phone ( see photo below).

With many reservations, I opted for a smart phone. While I do not want to be a slave to conformity, I relished the notion of a higher quality camera.  I still keep the phone off…

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Healing Weekend Retreat

Last weekend unexpectedly lead me to places near and far, old and new, all at once. I want to share some of the gifts received as a result of staying open and vulnerable. Meeting with my spiritual director last Saturday unleashed memories and visions that were both beautiful and haunting. It was interesting to witness how thoughts, feelings, and images seemed to ricochet off one another, in imperfect harmony.

The movement of thought is often fluid and in-congruent, organic and non-linear. Considering hope led me to read an email link about a Hope gathering led by Sandy Bloom, a woman I deeply respect who created the Sanctuary movement. I was fortunate to be an intern at the Sanctuary inpatient  unit while pursuing my MSS. I was especially lucky to have some contact with Dr. Sandra Bloom, including interviewing her for a graduate school paper about my internship. This interest in Sanctuary in some ways was triggered by an Insight training I attended in my twenties. While looking back on the Training, the criticism about it being cultish may have been valid. Yet it was a valuable experience, rich with many synchronicities, both beautiful and haunting ( yes, a pattern is emerging here!) One exercise in particular sticks in my mind. It was a meditation on creating a sanctuary. I put a pinball machine in mine and was amazed to discover that one of the assistants had also done so! The word sanctuary was already loaded because as a teen I liked the Sanctuary album by the J Geils Band. You see how this keeps going and going..

wikipedia pub domain

Anyway, I did a meditation with my spiritual director to connect with my sanctuary and I immediately envisioned a tree house. This is striking because I usually need some time before I settle down and get centered. This tree house was bathed in light and covered with ivy and was incredibly cozy and inviting. It was likely triggered in part by a very moving scene in Grey’s Anatomy I had watched just the week before. I also reflected back on the womb-like and mystical allure of caves, especially Crystal Cave that I visited as a child.

I left the meeting invigorated and ready for adventures of the internal kind. The next day I decided to go back to Woodmere Art Museum and get some ” art therapy. ” The visit was fueled by the potency of Saturday’s meditation/stream of consciousness. Here are some images from my visit:

I will leave you with a quote from one of the artists whose work was exhibited:

While the quote is about shining a light on Black History, I think it can also be applied to spiritual growth. I see it taking place within as I follow the threads that originated in my imagination, now taking new form.

tree house images courtesy of wikipedia.org, public domain

Hey 2019, Let’s Dive Right In!

I bought this lavender day planner not long ago. I typically get a smaller black one, but opted for this larger model in one of my favorite colors. Ironically, I have a planner and very few plans. But it symbolizes a blank slate, brimming with possibilities. Rather than contemplate or over-analyze, I prefer to dive right in.

While most of my readers know that I am not much of a structured holiday person, I often find value in some of the practices or activities, knowing they stem from a good place. If we want to pick an arbitrary point for the new year, tomorrow’s partial solar eclipse in Capricorn is an excellent choice.  A solar eclipse occurs on a new moon and eclipses are like lunations on steroids, so tomorrow 1-4-19 at 8:28 EST could behold a fresh start for many.

I would like to share some videos on my first post of the year that made quite an impression on me. They share some similarities. but have distinct points of view. But I will begin with some recent photos taken a few days ago at Longwood Gardens. It is noteworthy that I have yet to dedicate an entire essay to my time there, because it has often served as one of my power places. Even on more mundane visits, it is always breathtakingly beautiful and every moment is unique in its own right.









The first two videos are by thought leaders that need no introduction, Matt Kahn and Lee Harris. Matt is more badass and Lee is a bit more polite, but they both offer excellent, often prophetic content on the current metaphysical climate. This new Matt Kahn video is called We belong to the Light. Matt jokes that it is channeled from Pat Benatar. He does not reference which song, but I would say it is We Belong. It is one of my old school favorites. I googled the lyrics and the first line of the chorus is We belong to the light. Funny, I sang it as We belong to the night.

What I found especially significant in this teaching is Matt’s suggestion for how to handle “unusual events”. He advises against asking why something happens or looking for an accurate explanation. Instead, he instructs us to ask ourselves ” What do we need?” I really like this idea because it let’s us focus on how to take better care of ourselves instead of going off on some intellectual tangent. Matt is very much about self-care these days and finds many inventive strategies for flowing with life, rather than beating up ourselves or anyone/anything outside of ourselves ( as if there really is an outside?)

This next video is a real gem because it is a Live 1 hour segment. Unlike the monthly energy forecasts, this presentation goes into more detail and even features a Q&A section at the end! What I found most interesting here is Lee’s take on 2019 as the end of one 7 year cycle and the beginning of a new 7 year cycle. While 2019 in a 3 year in numerology, there are individual numerological cycles ( not to mention astrological cycles) all at play simultaneously. Lee delves into the 2012 phenomenon and how it led us to this point in time. I highly recommend you save this one and listen in small increments, as I often do with Matt’s videos. I often fall asleep if I watch for too much at one sitting!

This final selection is seemingly divergent from the two previous ones, but I would say only on the surface. Bandersnatch is the first movie version of Netflix’s highly popular, controversial Black Mirror series. One could say I am a reluctant fan of this very dark, mysterious Sci Fi series available on the Netflix streaming service. This piece is not only their first full feature film, but it is also interactive. You, the viewer get to make choices on how the story progresses. Without giving too much away, this interactive process lends itself to a story within a story framework that explores, fate vs destiny, parallel realities, and time travel. Why do I include it with the previous videos that do seem more light and optimistic? What all three have in common is that they are highly engaging and invite the viewer to get off the escalator and empower yourself.

I am more inclined to say that free will is not all that free at this juncture. And yet, I do think that making choices can lead to brighter outcomes. How we choose and why we choose is up to you! Check out all three if possible ( Netflix is not free so I included the trailer only) and let me know you reactions in the comments.

This image above is a smaller version of the header photo. I selected it as the header because it serves as a metaphor for 2019. It is fresh and new, multi-faceted, and interactive. It also brings the light and lets you decide where you end and where you begin. So either with or without plans or resolutions, take a deep breath and dive right in.

I wish you a very blessed 2019! 

 

Just one more thing ~  Keep your eyes glued to this site as I will be posting a big surprise very soon!

 

Until then, wishing you a healthy and transformative eclipse.

Sludge Party ~ Neptune Direct

celestial-dreams.jpg

UPDATE: The transits are fast and furious for most of 2018: This morning’s Full Gemini Moon and then tomorrow Neptune stations direct! Have you felt spiritually depleted, scattered, overwhelmed? The sludge party should be over soon. Get more sleep, stay grounded, and eat protein.   Happy Full Moon and get your Gemini on 🙂

As an homage to the film Sausage Party, I propose that we name Saturday night’s Neptune station the Sludge Party.

I dreamt last night of being prevented from exiting a train at my stop so I had no choice but to get off at the next stop. While the distance between stops was short, I was transported to another land. It was beautiful , with many waterways and falls. I spotted a pinball arcade and a Wawa ( local unbiquitous convenience store) , but everywhere I wandered, my calls for help were denied. I approached everyone and asked for the name of the town, but no one would answer. I told others I was lost and again, no response. I saw a spectacular pedestrian bridge that was massive. When I awoke I knew this dream was significant. I was reliving a childhood trauma of getting off at the wrong school bus stop at around age 5 or 6. No one was waiting  for me at my stop and I refused to leave with a neighbor child, because I was certain that her stop was not my home. I was mistaken. A woman found me and took me home and I knew my phone number. I was safely returned home, but this event left a huge scar. In the dream, however, I was an adult who felt ignored and alone. Everything seemed a wee bit out of focus and in ” slow mo.”

Hence the sludge party.

astro_2atw_01_david_bowie-13837-4359-2

Since I never wrote my David Bowie tribute, I will showcase some of his music here tonight. Bowie was quite Neptunian, with Neptune squaring natal Sun, Mercury, and Mars and a Sun Mars conjunction in the 12th house.  I think he would approve of this linkage. It is cool to note that there is a Bowie asteroid 342843, which sits between my natal sun and Neptune. It is closely conjunct both of them , which surprised and delighted me. David Bowie has been a huge influence on me since my early teens and the recent discovery of his asteroid is lovely validation of my affinity with his essence.

Sludge, quicksand, delusion, subtle innuendo, loss, impostor, stranger, aimlessly wandering, illusion, dreams ~ all trés Neptune.

So here is a semi-random sampling of some of my favorite Bowie performances to accompany us on the hero’s journey across the bridge towards higher consciousness, with a side order of sludge for good measure.

 

 

 

 

image credits ~ header image: wikipedia.org, public domain, butterfly: Josephine Wall

MICHELLE WALLING: “The False Matrix Mission Trick”

Not surprisingly, whatever we focus on multiplies. Here is a post on Soul Mission that resonates with me and my blog challenge rather strongly. I do not agree with all of it, nor is that required.  Michelle makes some strong points, especially about specialness and spiritual bypass.

In light, litebeing

Ascension Avatar

A popular false light tactic is to make you feel like you are a “chosen one”, with a mission that is above all else, including human relationships and love. Many people jump into healing, websites, and channeling without doing the inner work first, because a “guide” came to them with a message.

We are the ultimate creators, and when we are still operating and creating from lower vibrations EVERYTHING gets distorted. That is the nature of the reality of the matrix. Everything is backward and upside down, and the truth is that we created it that way. Now it is time to un-create. First we have to recognize what needs to be un-created, and in this case, it is distortion. Distorted healing methods, distorted guides and messengers, and most of all, distorted focus on your true mission.

You are here to BE LOVE IN A HUMAN BODY, which trumps all…

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Wake Me Up Before I Go – Go

Here is my contribution to A Selection of True Awakening Stories, Part III, created and organized by the magnificent Barbara. Thanks to my dear friend Barbara for making this all possible and gently nudging me to dig deeper into my being and scoop out some goodies to convert into the written word!

This project will be converted to a free e-book for all to enjoy and savor with glee. The previous two e-books are available for download on the right sidebar of my site’s home page.

I would suggest you read or re-read my previous two awakening stories listed below to gain a broader understanding of my journey:

Part I

Part II

This third installment will cover my “travels” from early 2016 until this present moment. While not much has really changed at the surface level, there has been tremendous energetic shifts just below the surface. Many of my regular readers know I use imagery as part of my communication process. Art and text ( often married with music as well) do more together than separately. I have chosen a few paintings by Julian Weir to complement today’s “cosmic update”. These paintings were selected because reality is depicted as malleable, shaded ,variable, soft and muted. I would say that my current state of being is quite porous, mutable, in flux, and often multi-dimensional. No-thing is ever how it seems, at least not from my vantage point.

Time is Fleeting: While I have functioned as a therapist at two different organizations, become more immersed in a local astrology group, and have witnessed more lovely souls enter and leave my orbit, these details matter little. While reading a high school year book recently, I discovered a quote that still rings true.

Isn’t it strange how all of the years dissolved into just a feeling?

I remember being blown away by this insight at the time. I do agree that all of human/being existence is reduced to momentary impressions and reactions. Feelings turn into memories but cannot replace the in-the-moment experience.

When you really get down to it, all we are left with are our experiences. Time moves so quickly in ” my reality” that I look back less and focus as much as possible on the moment in front of me. It requires plenty of re-programming for me to succeed, especially in this informational overload society. Experiences are purer when lived in the Now and the moment is all there is. I realize that while living in a body is limiting, it is still unique.

I’m on the Road to No-where:  The painting above is called The Road to Nowhere, which I did not notice until it was already uploaded. It fits in perfectly with the notion that there is no-thing to do, no-where to go, and no-one to be.

The past few years have been about picking myself up and dusting myself off after falling down over and over and over again. While it appears that my recent journey is mostly about recovering from an assortment of bizarre and mundane obstacles, I sense that IAM growing and evolving behind the scenes. It is obvious to me that I want to spend my remaining time on Earth serving the elevation of consciousness. I do not want to live my days “phoning it in.” Lately I have been drawn to working in the field of addiction. Many moons ago my psychic buddy Bob mentioned in a reading that I would do well working with addicts. It did not appeal to me then, but it has become a passion of mine. While I currently interview for jobs at  inpatient rehabs and outpatient clinics, it has dawned on me that my last employer really took a chance by hiring me. I realize that I could not answer many of the specific questions about chemical dependence  treatment being asked of me now, back then. I know now how much I did not know. (This doesn’t apply just to addiction treatment either!)

I did acquire so much knowledge in such a short amount of time. Looking back, it seems miraculous that my former supervisor advocated to bring me onboard. It took me some time ( I started that job 1 year ago today) to realize that the Universe was really conspiring to help me grow and manifest more of the experiences that I desire. I find it pointless to not serve humanity, especially at this point in our species’ development. The question remains: How to do so without getting stuck in the goo of despair?

wikiart.org public domain, artist Julian Weir

The Sludge Party continues:  There is so much sludge! I am referring to unresolved material that remains hidden at the unconscious and often cellular level. The more we live, the more we acquire. So many old insecurities have re-emerged recently, issues I thought we cleared for good. Some recent sludge has come up around rejection, being bullied, and #metoo incidents that date all the way back to the 6th grade. Revisiting high school via my class HS Reunion FB page has resulted in many dreams including former “mean girl” classmates along with some pleasant exchanges online. It is a mixed bag, sludge and fudge.  Afterall, looking at the old yearbooks revealed that awesome quote about the flow of time and how we process it.

The #metoo movement triggered old memories that I thought were long resolved. Many spiritual teachers say that we perpetually clear more and more as old content emerges again in a spiral formation. Other teachers say we do not need to clear anymore. All I know is that I faced head on some rather uncomfortable emotions, yet again.  I dealt with them, for now.

Ascension Apocalypse: While I am still as confused as ever about all the Ds ( densities and dimensions), I like the concept of ascension and tend to attract more and more information online and offline about this topic. While those who know me well would describe my personality as fixed and stubborn, I have revised my belief system several times, especially since the dawning of the new millennium. For example, I really could not relate to the notion that practically all Earthlings are slaves to the machine. It appeared to be a preposterous exaggeration.  Yes, I descended in part from an enslaved people. But I have never been forced to work without pay or treated like I had no value.  As I consider how primitive and stagnant our civilization is in terms of basic living conditions, deplorable does not even begin to cover it! Most spirits in human bodies have to work most of their lives to barely cover food and shelter, with little or nothing leftover. Millions live in squalor and are perpetually hungry. When I look at my life, despite all the education and skills, I have had to accept employment that was far less from what I desired, just to survive.  This planet finds violence and incarceration acceptable and does not agree that food, medical care, and education are birthrights. It is truly a dog- eat-dog mentality at play , while the 1 percent have more resources than they could possibly ever use.

Why do we live this way?

Matrix or not, there has got to be a purer, kinder way to live on this beautiful planet called Gaia. So I continue to do my best, using my guidance and intuition to plant me where I am needed. But there are many moments when I wonder if we are too late.

George Michael, Am I Woke Yet?  I titled this entry Wake Me Up Before I Go-Go as a riff on the Wham classic Wake Me Up Before You Go-Go. This song has nothing at all to do with this topic, but I adore George Michael, one of the many sensitive souls who left Earth too soon. And yet, if you check out the video link provided above, you will see George is wearing a t-shirt with the words CHOOSE LIFE on it, hmmmm.

In any case, the title really distills what matters to me most at this juncture. I really, really, really, ( did I say really? ) REALLY, do not want to return here again in a body. I realized as a child that I did not want to be here and it only took a few more years to realize that I am not interested in doing this again. Per usual, the cosmic winks continue, as my phone began to ring just  while I typed the word again! I am not playing. There has to be more to explore in other realms.

So I conclude this cosmic update to say that I want to awaken as fully as possible, with love and nurture and care, before this body expires.  I do not wish to remain stuck on the karmic wheel and be a slave to any “authorities” whoever or whatever they may be. I doubt very much I would have chosen my circumstances without the goal of transcendence and awakening. If ascension is on the table, I want in! Maybe I am already partially there. There is no scorecard where I  track my progress, however both longing and love do register in my heart.

images courtesy of wikiart.org, public domain

Who Are You ? Part II

This is the next segment in the Who are You? series that examines my ever-shifting identity. The first installment addressed my ancestry and where I came from. This piece considers my current state of being. I have been busy, mostly internally. I find that many of my attempts to entertain myself have fallen flat as I realize that time is fleeting and I need to be employed. Can’t you hear it, tick – tock, tick – tock?

September is here. It is Labor Day in the US, the unofficial end of Summer. I have visited September months ago in my mind and now my thought form has manifested. There was a time, an innocent time, when September lifted my spirits simply by arriving. I can still visualize shiny new brown leather shoes, ready to be broken in. And then of course came the pièce de résistance, September Vogue. It wasn’t really the actual clothes themselves that set my heart a flutter, as I am not a fashionista at all. For me, the excitement was in discovering the new trends, color schemes, and accessories for the fresh new season. The September issue was huge and bulky, filled with exotic advertisements that promised fulfillment of dreams. If only it was so simple now.

I work tirelessly to prevent sinking into a permanent blue mood by following passions, curiosity, and/or hunches. Sometimes following the thread leads to peace. Other times it leads to bleak uncertainty.

Here are a few examples of what I am into now :

What I am doing: I take myself places that have historically altered my mood in a good way. While I am a vastly different person spiritually, certain activities still whisper a promise of joy.  Movies, art museums, walks in nature, restaurants, visits with friends ; I have tried them all.  My latest trip to the Phila Museum of Art offered up close and personal views of wonderful creations, but the trip itself was unpleasant and exhausting. Yet, I was able to capture some images to share with you.


What I am thinking: I have been working on raising my vibration and resisting the temptation to stay in fear and hopelessness. I have been bombarded with childhood memories triggered by spending time on my High School Reunion Facebook Page and watching a certain television series ( to be explored later in this essay.) The memories are sweet and bitter, but not bittersweet. Some recollections are joyous and others are ghastly. There are also a few that don’t really register much emotion, more of a hmmmmm.. I am often balancing my need to problem solve with the desire to be in the flow. This often trips me up. The past few weeks has resulted in many electrical and technological challenges, before and after Mercury retrograde. Cable, Internet, Laptop, landline, kitchen fixture, thermostat, full throttle power outages, often intermittent and without warning. The newest wrinkle is I can call out on my phone, but no one can call me. This does seem like a metaphor for my identity at this moment. I feel that others don’t see me, hear me, or value me. This does not mean that I am not seen,  heard, or valued, but that my perception is distorted. I feel very disconnected or invisible most of the time.

Searching for work has brought out my cynicism and resentment. These personal traits do not suggest high vibrations.  As with most issues,  I vacillate between strategic thinking and letting go. When I let go, I feel like I ought to be doing something practical. While in problem solving mode, I consider that I am trying too hard and need to slide into the moment and align with Source.

What I am reading: Just like most activities, I read more than one book at a time.  Its how I roll. But  Playing the Ascension Game by Diana Stone has been an unusual diversion that may turn out to be a “game changer”. Diana Stone was an astrologer, shaman, author, and Aquarian provocateur. I do not recall when I got wind of her, but eventually discovered her website and got on her mailing list. Her newsletters were long-winded but quite enthralling. Withe her Sun on my Ascendant, I found a true partner in crime. We corresponded a few times and she even read my blog! She was best friends with the awesome astrologer  Donna Cunningham, who I also had the privilege of knowing online. They both departed recently and Diana’s passing prompted me to buy her book. It is written in a conversational style and covers so many topics on metaphysics. It is close to 500 pages long and is close in size to that September issue of Vogue! It reads like a diary of the coolest kind, as she recounts her experience with traveling to several dimensions and uncovering all sorts of bizarre occurrences. Her  accounts in the Coffee Chronicles lead me to drink a vanilla latte today after a long break from all things coffee. Her book makes me see miracles again, even if only vicariously. It reminds me that I once lived this way. It is THAT compelling. This isn’t really a review, but get your hands on this book.

What I am viewing: I am perpetually viewing something, or so it seems. Black Mirror, Q Anon videos. Matt Kahn. Gaia TV, WordPress blogs ( yea!), articles on Ascension, job listings, Facebook posts, emails, etc. Note how I include all screen activity as viewing. It is not the same as reading off-screen. Tonight I will focus on one series that has me blissfully distracted. The AMC series Mad Men has become an addiction that leaves me wanting more. The show is about a Manhattan advertising firm in the 1960s. It focuses on several characters, but Don Draper is the big fish, if you will. He is a man with a flimsy identity ( sounds familiar?) who exhibits complexity, compassion, and recklessness. He is a tough nut to crack during a very tumultuous time in our planet’s history. I watched a few episodes while it was airing, but have taken to binge-watching it now via Netflix. The series begins where I began, in New York City in 1960. Watching this show allows me to experience some of what was happening in my childhood, but now as an adult. I lived through most of this decade, but was too young to really taste it. The narrative emphasizes how hard it must have been to be female in mid-century America. Women were called girls and were treated  mostly like porcelain dolls or whores. Expectations were low and alcohol seemed to be running from the faucets. Watching this series helps me understand how my parents were socialized. The field of advertising fascinates me, from the artistic angle. I considered briefly entering this field as a writer. In high school I discovered that one of my classmate’s father was in the business. He showed me a little about what goes on behind TV commercials and I was captivated by his insights. Advertising still strikes me as a fascinating blend of  psychology and art, although I am less and less a capitalist with every breath I take.

Don Draper is played by the actor Jon Hamm, who happens to be a Pisces. He is also a recovering alcoholic who spent some time in Rehab. According to Google, he also was in an episode of Black Mirror! Gotta love those synchs. His Piscean persona is so evident in the Don Draper character. His aka could be Dapper Don as his character is so well put together, at least externally. Tall, handsome, creative, charming, and sometimes sensitive. He is also a chronic liar, womanizer, and escape artist, expert at shape-shifting and manipulation. A stunning example of a wounded soul painted over with a illusory handsome veneer.

Jon Hamm happens to be a great actor in a series that contains an excellent ensemble cast. At times it seems like I am watching an old fave The Sopranos, because there is an overlap between big business and the mob. The other parallel is more subtle, but so powerful. Many of the most profound scenes are portrayed without dialogue. What isn’t being said is what stands out here. This creative technique was also very skillfully executed in The Sopranos.  I wonder if some of the writers worked on both shows. Update: Damn I’m good! Just read an article about Mad Men creator Matt Weiner that said that he wrote a couple of Sopranos episodes. Either I am psychic or a really great observer of television writing or both!

I continue to be smitten with subtlety as an expression of life. What isn’t said is often more palpable than what is spoken. The role of the observer is closer to “real” than identifying with a bunch of cells encased in human flesh. The less obvious, more nuanced messages and clues often lead me out of darkness these days. I do process and receive the dark, but must admit that sustained light has been a scarce visitor these days. The numerous diversions and distractions rarely lead me anywhere solid. I am learning to adjust to living an untethered life. But it ain’t a cakewalk, this ascension business. I am not giving up, but am definitely struggling. Fortunately there is so much more to watch on Netlflix. I will take refuge wherever I can nowadays.

As I took in this sculpture last week at the Art Museum, it revealed a subtle message to me. The Bob Marley tune Three Little Birds entered my mind.

Don’t worry bout a thing, cause every little thing’s gonna be alright.

 

Clearing Away for a Faerie Future

Whew! We survived another Eclipse season. When I think back to where I was one year ago during the August eclipses, I am so grateful to be here now. Not to say that this summer has been a party, but hey, I have grown quite a bit since then. There really is no other choice. Many mornings I wake up with a heaviness of a sense of dread, wondering if I am picking up collective energies, or my own. Sometimes the clarity I seek alludes me. Yesterday was a very social day for me and it was very celebratory in a true Leonine manner. I had such a lovely time with friends, one of which is a Leo. Today had a darker vibe and  a couple of hours ago I heard some horrific news about a woman who died way too young. She was not a patient, but someone I knew as a teen.  But I will not let it drag me down. I will absorb the information and then let it go.  It will be added to the clearing pile.

Let me elaborate: I have been dedicating myself to clearing away debris, literally and metaphorically. It has become almost an obsession for me, emerging from my higher self.  I recently hired a service to clear out an old tv and desktop from my place, which made room to organize more stuff. There comes a time when you will ultimately know what no longer suits you. This retrograde period has allowed me to release old memories from high school, courtesy of a high school reunion Facebook group. I find it interesting that while I am processing and discarding,  pleasant memories of people and places are coming back into consciousness. I must admit that the internet is a fine tool for refreshing the details, but then again, what IS the internet really? Energy like everything else in existence.

While synchs are a daily event, the truly mystical has eluded me for quite some time. But a subtle discovery brought magick back into focus:

It has been difficult the past few days to find parking near my door, so I have had to park further away. Why, I wondered, was this happening? Maybe so I could find this lovely feather today while walking to my car. I would not have seen it otherwise. I have not found a feather like this in about  2 years , so it grabbed my attention, and what you attend to expands. These type of experiences strengthen my faith that all is really well, even in the midst of stagnation and chaos.

Sometimes clearing is metaphorical or occurs on a parallel plane. I am a computer game enthusiast. I really like building cities so I am attracted to games that focus on this angle.  Elvenar  is a Facebook game that has a mystical feel. There are several worlds to play in and the builder can focus on human or non-human realms. When I reached a certain level I was close to the fairy realm. I was prompted to sell most of what I had built over years to clear the way for a new type of fairy technology. I found myself resisting this process. I did not want to undo all this work and leave my city practically bare.

Then it hit me, this is where I am headed on my ascension journey. I must be able to sit with emptiness and continue dismantling what doesn’t fit into my life anymore. I told myself ” Linda, listen to the fairy prompt and sell your stuff!”. My city has miniature humans and a few fairies now walking among my city streets. The city is in flux and has plenty of room to breathe.  This is where I need to be.

Isn’t it ironic that on the morning that the game suggested I convert to a fairy avatar that this huge beetle showed up to greet me? I saw the beetle at the exact moment that I was trying out the new avatar.  Beetle medicine is about transformation after-all. You all may wonder how much time I am devoting to computer games, but unemployment has its perks (Or not).

My header image is a faith plaque I purchased last December. I participated in a Secret Santa at work and someone mentioned buying small gifts in anticipation of the Secret Santa event. I was at Cracker Barrel and saw the plaques. I liked them so much that I bought one for my coworker and one for myself. I figured it would be a nice addition to my office. I look at it daily to remind me that faith has a place in my spiritual practice. I don’t hold the philosophy that some otherworldly being will save me, but rather that my time here is on purpose and that guidance is a certainty.

The video below is a song written by Jon Bon Jovi for Stevie Nicks. It is quite on point regarding living with what appears and embracing the mystery. I dedicate this song and this post to all who have left this planet too soon. While it seems to me that the number of souls taking the nearest exit are increasing exponentially, that does not diminish the value they hold or the love they still engender.