Poetry – Grace Everpresent

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Where is Grace?

Grace is realizing the car keys are in your other pocket

Grace is when the cop gives you a warning this time

Grace is when the red birds descend on your terrace ” just because”

Grace is when you discover your checkbook error

that you subtracted one hundred dollars by mistake

Grace is when the sky opens and the sun tells the clouds to get lost for a spell

Grace is the neighbor’s cat who snuggles with you after yours has passed away

Grace is the stranger who helps you pick up your groceries off the floor

Grace is the MRI that reveals you don’t have that illness after all

Grace is accepting what is and surviving with renewed hope

Grace is a whole heart after a lifetime of shatters and scars

Grace is a million new beginnings

Grace is finding love way past your prime

Grace is everpresent

© litebeing chronicles 2013

update:

I wrote this poem , or rather this poem wrote me, from a place filled with a mixture of despair, emptiness, hope, and gratitude. Your response has been wonderful and I thank you.  My poetry has always been fueled by intense emotion and manifests only when it is good and ready. Stay tuned for new arrivals in future posts.

 

bird image courtesy of freerangestock.com
header image by © litebeing chronicles 2013

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Winter Review ~ Who is Taking the Wheel?

This is the third and final installment of my Winter Review Series, an attempt to claim and integrate the timeline from September 2017 through March 2018. Now is as good a time as any to put this all to bed. We are approaching a full Pisces Moon, Mars is going direct in a few days, and the Sun has entered Virgo. It feels to me like we are shimmying up to Indian Summer, with the cooler mornings and the influx of golden leaves leaving their homes and touching the ground. So my goal is to take one last look at this unusually intense time in my life. I truly want to make room for whatever is meant to enliven my next “season.”

Road to Know-where: There was one consistent thread sewn into this timeline, road rage on steroids. Whether I was driving on small one -way streets or major roadways, during rush hour or lunch time, on weekdays or holidays, most of the drivers were gunning for each other. Rarely did I not drive by an accident that just took place or a near miss ( often my vehicle). Occasionally I would see an accident in progress, not fun at all. Initially it seemed like I was imagining this pattern, so I discussed it with others. Many people told me that they were noticing the same phenomenon. I had to psychically protect myself and this made me uncomfortable. But I had to stay on red alert and be a defensive driver. There seemed to be a major war happening, but I never got the memo.

 Snowday, NO – WAY! : An alternate description of this timeline could be ” The Winter of My Discontent.” The snow was relentless and I was ill prepared. After so many years of mild winters, this past one was excruciating. Often my drive home would be several hours. Since a portion of my commute was through wooded areas, fallen trees were a problem. I often would find myself in front of a tree blocking the road with no detour sign in sight. I did not know the area well and was not familiar with alternate routes. My commute reminded me of one of those nightmares where you want to scream but no words come out, or someone is chasing you and you are immobilized. Or you are simply lost while driving and each turn takes you further away from your intended destination.  When was the snow going to stop? Finally, some relief arrived around the beginning of April. The weather only started to improve after I was laid off. In fact, the raging drivers also began to mellow about two months ago. If I was paranoid I might consider that my job was causing climate change and vicious assassins  to populate the freeways.

Every day is a winding road: The commute was horrific and so burdensome on multiple levels. Yet, I did manage to survive. A positive transit of Saturn trining my natal Pluto ( still in effect) afforded me the ability to withstand pressure that would usually bring me to my knees. I became more flexible as a commuter, albeit one who does not use a GPS. I learned to become more aware of my immediate environment and recognize, yet again, that I am here as a human with flaws and limitations. This meant that I decided to love myself more and praise myself for my ability to adapt. This was in the midst of regular rumors that the rehab was going to be sold or was going to fold (see I can rhyme). I knew in my heart that some of the tension in the office was due to upheaval and uncertainty. I minimized it for a while because I was told by management that things were fine ( until they weren’t). Eventually I realized that the toxicity was really harmful to me and my patients. I even considered resigning. A draft resignation letter was conceived in my head, plus I  began organizing my office in the event that I needed to pack up quickly. I suppose I picked up intuitively on the layoffs before they happened. This did not in any way protect me from the pain or disappointment. It did help me see how much investment I still place in identifying as a healer. It also was another reminder that I still harbor some resentment about moving so much as a child, feeling rootless and often worthless or expendable. After all these years, still more work to do with my shadow!

Spirit ( or Grasshopper) take the wheel: Guess who just came by to greet me? I was about to take a break from writing and went to draw the blinds. This is the second time I ever recall seeing a grasshopper here at night. The other time he/she moved along before I could snap a shot.  This is no accident or coincidence.

The sighting arrived just in time for me to say hey, it is alright. While I do feel traumatized by losing two jobs due to downsizing in less than one year, I am not alone. And make no  mistake, I do not use the word trauma loosely. This has been a tough year. I lost the mental health job about one year ago and was called about the rehab job in September 2017, just shy of a year ago. I still get twinges of pain or access memories in unexpected ways. I get an email from a former coworker or hear a song that reminds me of my patients. Sometimes I have a dream that I am still at work. Other times reading about the opioid crisis will trigger something deep within. And let’s not forget about the endless recitation about being laid off that I am required to do every time I am on an interview for a new gig. ” So why aren’t you working now? ” ” Tell me about your last job – why did you leave? ” ” What happened over at @$^&#^? I hear they are not doing well anymore, what a shame.”  I saw a former coworker from the rehab at my last interview and it was awkward. Where do I fit in?  It is easy to wonder if I will ever be employed again.

This job search is exhausting.

 

I cannot continue to fool myself any longer that I am driving this vehicle all by myself. This is where surrender comes in.  Even when I  practically drown in the silence of the void, I am neither abandoned or forgotten. Grasshopper ( or Allah , Jesus, Buddha, Goddess, etc) is in charge. Little self never was and never will be, not in this human form. I really don’t understand why this Winter time period was fraught with so much drama and so many unusual obstacles. All I wanted to do was help people in pain get themselves together. I wanted to serve and have myself placed in a position where I could contribute to addressing the addiction epidemic.  This never was about ego for me. I wanted to be used by Spirit where I could best be of use. I still feel that way.  Yet, I do comprehend that it is not necessary to know why. That does not lessen the sting or dry the many tears. But it still remains the truth.

I could end this trilogy with Carrie Underwood’s tune Jesus Take the Wheel, but this Sheryl Crow classic seems more on point. Take a listen and you’ll understand why.

It is time now to say good night to the agony and ecstasy of Bensalem PA ; from the beginning ~ my senior year of college when I first noticed an intriguing rehab to the end, which I believe is NOW.  I won’t forget all the people or experiences over the course of decades  that made me smile or let my heart sing. But in order to move on, I have to say goodbye. It is likely that more lessons will be revealed, as this is typically the case. But living in the past has never accomplished what I hoped it would. Spying Grasshopper tonight has taught me well. There is so much more to receive when my mind and heart are open and willing to let love in.

road images courtesy of pexels.com, public domain

Clearing Away for a Faerie Future

Whew! We survived another Eclipse season. When I think back to where I was one year ago during the August eclipses, I am so grateful to be here now. Not to say that this summer has been a party, but hey, I have grown quite a bit since then. There really is no other choice. Many mornings I wake up with a heaviness of a sense of dread, wondering if I am picking up collective energies, or my own. Sometimes the clarity I seek alludes me. Yesterday was a very social day for me and it was very celebratory in a true Leonine manner. I had such a lovely time with friends, one of which is a Leo. Today had a darker vibe and  a couple of hours ago I heard some horrific news about a woman who died way too young. She was not a patient, but someone I knew as a teen.  But I will not let it drag me down. I will absorb the information and then let it go.  It will be added to the clearing pile.

Let me elaborate: I have been dedicating myself to clearing away debris, literally and metaphorically. It has become almost an obsession for me, emerging from my higher self.  I recently hired a service to clear out an old tv and desktop from my place, which made room to organize more stuff. There comes a time when you will ultimately know what no longer suits you. This retrograde period has allowed me to release old memories from high school, courtesy of a high school reunion Facebook group. I find it interesting that while I am processing and discarding,  pleasant memories of people and places are coming back into consciousness. I must admit that the internet is a fine tool for refreshing the details, but then again, what IS the internet really? Energy like everything else in existence.

While synchs are a daily event, the truly mystical has eluded me for quite some time. But a subtle discovery brought magick back into focus:

It has been difficult the past few days to find parking near my door, so I have had to park further away. Why, I wondered, was this happening? Maybe so I could find this lovely feather today while walking to my car. I would not have seen it otherwise. I have not found a feather like this in about  2 years , so it grabbed my attention, and what you attend to expands. These type of experiences strengthen my faith that all is really well, even in the midst of stagnation and chaos.

Sometimes clearing is metaphorical or occurs on a parallel plane. I am a computer game enthusiast. I really like building cities so I am attracted to games that focus on this angle.  Elvenar  is a Facebook game that has a mystical feel. There are several worlds to play in and the builder can focus on human or non-human realms. When I reached a certain level I was close to the fairy realm. I was prompted to sell most of what I had built over years to clear the way for a new type of fairy technology. I found myself resisting this process. I did not want to undo all this work and leave my city practically bare.

Then it hit me, this is where I am headed on my ascension journey. I must be able to sit with emptiness and continue dismantling what doesn’t fit into my life anymore. I told myself ” Linda, listen to the fairy prompt and sell your stuff!”. My city has miniature humans and a few fairies now walking among my city streets. The city is in flux and has plenty of room to breathe.  This is where I need to be.

Isn’t it ironic that on the morning that the game suggested I convert to a fairy avatar that this huge beetle showed up to greet me? I saw the beetle at the exact moment that I was trying out the new avatar.  Beetle medicine is about transformation after-all. You all may wonder how much time I am devoting to computer games, but unemployment has its perks (Or not).

My header image is a faith plaque I purchased last December. I participated in a Secret Santa at work and someone mentioned buying small gifts in anticipation of the Secret Santa event. I was at Cracker Barrel and saw the plaques. I liked them so much that I bought one for my coworker and one for myself. I figured it would be a nice addition to my office. I look at it daily to remind me that faith has a place in my spiritual practice. I don’t hold the philosophy that some otherworldly being will save me, but rather that my time here is on purpose and that guidance is a certainty.

The video below is a song written by Jon Bon Jovi for Stevie Nicks. It is quite on point regarding living with what appears and embracing the mystery. I dedicate this song and this post to all who have left this planet too soon. While it seems to me that the number of souls taking the nearest exit are increasing exponentially, that does not diminish the value they hold or the love they still engender.

Poetry – Grace Everpresent

I am having a shaky day, in the shadows of a brilliant Solstice Celebration last evening. I am in need of consolation, so I shall use my words to comfort myself. This poem was written during a very dark time and I remember it well.

As a bonus, I am linking to an article I found about Grace. Hope you enjoy it as much as I did.

Here is a sample:

Grace is Courage – You are in a state of grace when, during those moments when you can see no way out of a predicament, you know that love will prevail. Even though you may feel afraid, there is so much love in your heart that you know you will not give up. Grace is the warmth in your heart that gives you courage.

Please hold me in your thoughts and prayers as I navigate another challenge that I cannot control or avoid. The only way is through.

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Where is Grace?

Grace is realizing the car keys are in your other pocket

Grace is when the cop gives you a warning this time

Grace is when the red birds descend on your terrace ” just because”

Grace is when you discover your checkbook error

that you subtracted one hundred dollars by mistake

Grace is when the sky opens and the sun tells the clouds to get lost for a spell

Grace is the neighbor’s cat who snuggles with you after yours has passed away

Grace is the stranger who helps you pick up your groceries off the floor

Grace is the MRI that reveals you don’t have that illness after all

Grace is accepting what is and surviving with renewed hope

Grace is a whole heart after a lifetime of shatters and scars

Grace is a million new beginnings

Grace is finding love way past your prime

Grace is everpresent

© litebeing chronicles 2013

update (2013) :

I wrote this poem , or rather this poem wrote me, from a place filled with a mixture of despair, emptiness, hope, and gratitude. Your response has been wonderful and I thank you.  My poetry has always been fueled by intense emotion and manifests only when it is good and ready. Stay tuned for new arrivals in future posts.

 

bird image courtesy of freerangestock.com
header image by © litebeing chronicles 2013

Poetry – Grace Everpresent ( repost by popular demand – mine)

 

photo_9285_20090125

Where is Grace?

Grace is realizing the car keys are in your other pocket

Grace is when the cop gives you a warning this time

Grace is when the red birds descend on your terrace ” just because”

Grace is when you discover your checkbook error

that you subtracted one hundred dollars by mistake

Grace is when the sky opens and the sun tells the clouds to get lost for a spell

Grace is the neighbor’s cat who snuggles with you after yours has passed away

Grace is the stranger who helps you pick up your groceries off the floor

Grace is the MRI that reveals you don’t have that illness after all

Grace is accepting what is and surviving with renewed hope

Grace is a whole heart after a lifetime of shatters and scars

Grace is a million new beginnings

Grace is finding love way past your prime

Grace is everpresent

© litebeing chronicles 2013

* I am re-posting this tonight to cheer myself up and hopefully help others who may be going through a difficult time. If you are struggling, please remember that our time here is precious and support is always available.

bird image courtesy of freerangestock.com

freerangestock.com

A Lifetime of Miracles

 I am not really a holiday person. I have written about this before. Yet at certain times in my life I have wished to embrace and experience firsthand the ” miracles of the season” that many have talked about. So far this season has been bleak for me. Yet this morning I looked out the window and noticed the birds are back. And I spotted a lone red bird ….

So I am reposting my poem Grace Everpresent as my Winter Solstice Message to you. There are many who are in need of love, abundance, comfort, etc at this time. I feel for you. I know you. I AM you.

WISHING YOU BLESSINGS AND A LIFETIME OF LIGHT

litebeing chronicles

photo_9285_20090125

Grace Everpresent

Where is Grace?

Grace is realizing the car keys are in your other pocket

Grace is when the cop gives you a warning this time

Grace is when the red birds descend on your terrace ” just because”

Grace is when you discover your checkbook error

that you subtracted one hundred dollars by mistake

Grace is when the sky opens and the sun tells the clouds to get lost for a spell

Grace is the neighbor’s cat who snuggles with you after yours has passed away

Grace is the stranger who helps you pick up your groceries off the floor

Grace is the MRI that reveals you don’t have that illness after all

Grace is accepting what is and surviving with renewed hope

Grace is a whole heart after a lifetime of shatters and scars

Grace is a million new beginnings

Grace is finding love way past your prime

Grace is everpresent

© litebeing chronicles 2013

update:

I wrote this poem , or rather this poem wrote me, from a place filled with a mixture of despair, emptiness, hope, and gratitude. Your response has been wonderful and I thank you.  My poetry has always been fueled by intense emotion and manifests only when it is good and ready. Stay tuned for new arrivals in future posts.

bird image courtesy of freerangestock.com

Poetry – Grace Everpresent

 

photo_9285_20090125

 

Where is Grace?

Grace is realizing the car keys are in your other pocket

Grace is when the cop gives you a warning this time

Grace is when the red birds descend on your terrace ” just because”

Grace is when you discover your checkbook error

that you subtracted one hundred dollars by mistake

Grace is when the sky opens and the sun tells the clouds to get lost for a spell

Grace is the neighbor’s cat who snuggles with you after yours has passed away

Grace is the stranger who helps you pick up your groceries off the floor

Grace is the MRI that reveals you don’t have that illness after all

Grace is accepting what is and surviving with renewed hope

Grace is a whole heart after a lifetime of shatters and scars

Grace is a million new beginnings

Grace is finding love way past your prime

Grace is everpresent

© litebeing chronicles 2013

update:

I wrote this poem , or rather this poem wrote me, from a place filled with a mixture of despair, emptiness, hope, and gratitude. Your response has been wonderful and I thank you.  My poetry has always been fueled by intense emotion and manifests only when it is good and ready. Stay tuned for new arrivals in future posts.

 

bird image courtesy of freerangestock.com
header image by © litebeing chronicles 2013